Love Gone P 1
by jess299
Summary: Bella loses her soul mate once again but this time she doesn't think she can survive. Jacob helps her cope and she soon runs into another love. enjoy : P.S the rating is an M just in case I think there maybe some chapters with some language.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N- This is a revised version of Love Gone and I've also made it into three parts because I couldn't stop writing lol. Review and let me know what you think! Thanks 3**

PART 1

Chapter 1 gone

I dragged myself out of bed not wanting to face what was now reality. I was 19 years old. I hated getting older than Edward and I hated even more not waking up next to him. A year ago he left me a couple days after my 18th birthday, ever since I have nightmares every time he's away. Not that I would tell him that because it would just make him feel unnecessarily responsible for something he couldn't control. Making my day even worse it was warm and sunny out which meant I wouldn't be seeing Edward and Alice at school. I went down stairs to eat some breakfast hoping maybe Edward was waiting for me since Charlie would no doubt be gone already.

" Hmm I guess he must be busy." I said out loud to myself.

I saw my disappointed face in the mirror and hated myself for being so pathetic. I'll just stop wallowing and call him. Problem solved. The phone rang 10 times and then went straight to voicemail. That's weird Edward usually answers on the first ring as if he knows I'm calling him. I called Alice next because if Edward didn't answer, Alice definitely would. Her phone went straight to voicemail also. I started getting panicky. I couldn't hear anything but the strange noise that was coming from my mouth. I was hyperventilating. I fell to the floor and put my head in between my knees and took deep breaths, something I knew all to well how to do due to the fact that I overreacted about so many things. This has to be a misunderstanding.

I decided to skip school and go to the Cullen's house. School was not even close to important compared to Edward. I neared the Cullen's house and felt my stomach twist in knots. I knew something wasn't right. I got out and checked the garage. None of the cars were there. No one answered the door. I went inside and the furniture was all covered in big white cloths. They. Were. All. Gone. This couldn't be happening again. I backed out the door shaking my head.

" No, no, no, no, no, no, no this isn't happening." I mumbled.

I stumbled down the stairs and fell on the gravel driveway hurting my knees. My eyes blurred with tears. My mind was a blur. I heard myself from far away.

" NO! HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME?" I screamed as tears streamed down my face.

I pounded the ground so hard I could feel my knuckles break.

" EDWARD!" I screamed over and over hoping he would reappear.

" HOW COULD YOU LEAVE ME YOU SAID YOU WOULD STAY FOREVER!"

I rocked back and forth on the ground for what seemed like forever crying. The pain of my hand was nothing compared to my once again shattered heart rattling around in my chest trying to find a way to break out.

" Edward" I heard my self mumble the whole time but my mind was somewhere else.

Someone touched my arm, I looked not bothering to stop saying his name. It was Jacob.

" Bella! Oh my god Bella are you alright! What happened? Someone called me and told me to come here because it was an emergency."

" They're gone...again" I cleared my head so I could listen to what he was saying to me. Did he say that someone called him to tell him to come here?

" Bella I'm so sorry... those _leeches_ will pay for this. I promise you that."

" Who called you?" I whispered desperately trying to clear my eyes so I could look around. Maybe one of them was watching.

" I'm not sure it wasn't a voice I recognized it was some girl."

Some strange girl? really? how could this be happening. My mind started to blank out again. I felt Jacob pick me up and put me in my truck. He drove me to my house and ran full speed inside not bothering to keep a human speed. I heard him call 911 and then he called Charlie. The ambulance arrived first.

" In here!" I heard Jacob shout right next to me.

" Her hand is all bloody and I think it's broken. Fix up her knees too!" Jacob barked at the emergency team.

" Why didn't you just take her to the hospital this isn't that bad." One of the guys said clearly annoyed.

" Look at her man. I didn't want to move her. This has happened before and it was bad. I just didn't want to risk anything."

" Ok well we can do the cast here but she will need to come in to get it taken off in a few weeks."

" Thanks." Jacob sighed out gratefully.

I heard Charlie's heavy feet run into the room.

" What happened here? What's wrong with her?" his deep voice pounded in my ear.

" She's broken a few knuckles and she's scraped up pretty bad." A man said close by.

"Who-" Charlie started to say but was cut off

" It looks like she did it herself." The man said

There was silence for a minute and then I heard Jacob whisper

" The Cullen's took off..again. Someone called me to go there and I found her there freaking out. She was hitting the ground with her fists and screaming. I've never seen anything like it before."

I squeezed my eyes shut and shook my head trying to get _him _out of my mind.

" Miss please stop you have to hold still."

I didn't stop. I wouldn't stop. I would do anything to keep the memories and images of my second family out of my head. I would take any pain that would stop it. I survived it the first time but could I really survive him leaving me another time? Everything was fine, more than fine it was perfect why would they leave without even telling me this time. They must really not care anymore if they couldn't even have the decency to tell me like last time. Last time, last time, last time was all I could think about. The things I went through.. I didn't, no I wouldn't go through it again!

" I'm sorry sir we're going to have to take her in and strap her down she wont lay still. We also have a physiatrist on site for her if you would like,"

It was silent for a few minutes and then Charlie whispered "fine."

They took me to the phyc ward at Forks Hospital-why they had one of those for a small town hospital I will never know- and I was strapped down to a bed and they gave me a sedative. The medicine did nothing to numb my pain. Every second I was unconscious I tortured myself with thoughts of Edward. I could feel the gaping hole in my chest like last time he left me. It was twice the size and hurt twice as much. Last year when he came back he said he would learn from his mistakes and he would never leave me again. What ever happened to that promise? Who was the mystery voice on the phone? Jacob would have known if it was one of the Cullen's. He was kind of on speaking bases with them. For my sanity-if I even had any left- If I survived the night and became conscious again I would never speak any of the Cullen's names, especially Edwards.

Chapter 2 p.a.i.n.

I could feel the sedative wearing off. My limbs didn't feel like gelatin anymore. My eyes fluttered and opened. The room was so bright it hurt. I started to shake. I didn't want to be awake. Why couldn't I have just died. Why couldn't some thirsty vampire come and take my life. I could feel my face getting wet with tears and that's when everyone ran to my side. Jacob, Charlie, Renee, and even Phil were there. Everyone was patting me and trying to calm me down. I didn't want to.

" Bella honey calm down please it's not good for you." Renee said with red eyes.

I could feel the huge bruises on my arms from the straps being so tight, I looked to Jacob who didn't even have words to say, I could see his face. It was a familiar expression. I had seen it before when he first became a werewolf. It was hard and sad, not his face at all. I didn't want him to look like that but I didn't have the strength to comfort someone else.

" Nurse! please help." I heard Charlie yell.

I hadn't noticed before but I was shaking violently, thrashing was actually more like it. What was wrong with me my mind was somewhere else and my body was acting like someone not like myself. I managed to spit out through my teeth that I didn't want anymore medicine. All four of them ran out of the room to go hunt someone down I suppose and in the few minutes they were gone someone walked in. A someone that was distinctly not human. Tanya. She rushed towards me and hugged me.

" Bella I'm sorry this is how it has to be. I came to see how you are but I must not stay. Know that the Cullen's are happy now. Goodbye."

Before I could say anything she was gone. She was only here for a few seconds but that was all it took to send me over the edge.

" NOOO!" I screamed with all my energy.

This hurt so much. I don't think I will ever be the same. With that scream brought on a nurse a doctor and more medicine. I could feel my body sinking into the numbness of being sedated.

When I woke up Jacob and Seth were there. They both looked really freaked. I was calm enough that I decided to talk.

" Jake...Seth?" I said clearing my throat.

" Oh Bella!" he rushed over " how are you Hun?"

I steered clear of that question and changed the subject.

" Where is my mom and Charlie?"

" They are on another floor making some arrangements." He looked uncomfortable.

" What do you mean Jake?"

" Bella... You really scared us. I mean you _hurt _yourself, you wouldn't stop screaming or shaking. I was so scared for you."

" Spit it out Jacob what are they doing?" I could feel my anxieties flaring.

" They want to get you some help"

" Help?"

" Yeah to help you through this-"

Charlie came in and cleared his throat, that was Jacob's cue to shut up.

" Bells how are you feeling?"

" Fine." I lied. It seems like I would be having to lie a lot for now on if they wanted me to talk to someone about what was going on.

" That's good.. Listen Bella now that you're awake me and you're mom and Dr. Spitz would like to talk to you a little."

" Well I'm kind of tired, could it wait?"

" I'm afraid not."

" Fine."

Charlie waved in my mom and Dr. Spitz I presumed. Jake and Seth were asked to leave and as Jacob walked out I could see a tear roll down his face. I hated doctors they made me nervous. I could tell when they had bad news, I was in the emergency room all too often.

" Hello Bella my name is Dr. Spitz." He smiled warmly, which I hated " I know you're probably having a tough time right now but we would like to help you with that."

Everyone was waiting for me to speak.

" Like seeing a shrink." I said sourly.

" Yes exactly that Bella. We have a new program here that is an intense 5 week program. You would stay here with some other patients that are doing the same program."

I didn't speak. I don't think I could even if I wanted to. This program would not work for me. When you went to see a shrink you had to tell the truth to help you get through things. I could not tell anyone the truth, they would lock me in a padded room for the rest of my life.

" Bells this is what is best for you and frankly you don't have a choice in the matter, this isn't like last time." Charlie spat out the last few words. " You'll start tomorrow."

**Alice's POV**

" Jasper this just isn't right. Think about what this will do to Bella. There has to be some mistake."

" Alice leave it. It's final."

I was putting my carry - on suite cases in the overhead compartment on the plane when a vision popped it my head. It was Bella in a hospital all bandaged and strapped to a bed. She was thrashing and screaming, a doctor was giving her a sedative. I gasped and my eyes started to prickle.

" Alice! What's wrong?" Jasper put his arms around me and sat me down.

" Bella." Was all I could whisper.

" What happened?"

" I knew this would be bad. She has literally gone crazy this time. They have her bandaged and strapped to a hospital bed and she's screaming.." I had to calm myself. I'm sure Jasper didn't calm me already because he knew I wanted to feel my own emotions as they came. " They had to put her to sleep so she wouldn't hurt herself." I slumped forward feeling exhausted. Jasper stared at me for almost a whole minute before he spoke again.

" This isn't right we have to do something."

**Jacob's POV**

I watched Bella sleep looking so peaceful, she deserved that. I remembered what happened yesterday. Billy answered the phone and said whoever it was said it was urgent. I thought maybe Sam needed me but it was a girl, No one I recognized.

" Jacob Black?"

" Yes?"

" This is an emergency, you need to go to the Cullen's house right away there is no time to waste. You will know what I mean when you get there."

The phone went dead. I didn't know what it was but I ran as fast as I could I knew driving might be faster but I didn't even think. My mind ran wild on the way there. What if a vampire got to Bella and the Cullen's couldn't save her ravaged body? I heard Bella's voice screaming in pain and lurched my feet faster. When she was in view I saw her hurting herself. She was screaming and crying and punching the ground. I tried to talk to her but she was to upset. she said they left again. I knew it! I knew this would happen again those stinkin bloodsuckers did it again. My hands started to shake in rage but I had to keep it together for Bella. I took her to her house and called 911. At first the emergency team was pretty pissed at me. I didn't care. Who were they to me, Bella was important now. When they had to put her to sleep I couldn't bear it. I cried openly. I didn't even care who saw me even though I would get hell from Leah later on. Bella was the love of my life and she was being hurt again. I would fix her if it is the last thing I could do! When she got out of that 5 week program I would be there for her no matter what and I would go with her anywhere.

Chapter 3

My time at the hospital was as depressing as it could get. There were 10 other kids in the program with me. I lied through my teeth the whole time. They think Edward was just some boy I loved and the Cullen's were a regular family that stuck by their son's decision to leave town. I wasn't even allowed visitors during my 5 weeks. What was wrong with these people? Having no one come see you is more depressing than being by yourself. After a few weeks I got over the thrashing and trying to hurt myself phase. The doctor said I was making great improvements, I was just trying to divert the attention away from me. I mostly just laid in bed and stared into space trying to tell myself I could get through this. I was living second by second. When I refused to eat for two weeks they began feeding me through tubes. I cut myself off from thinking anymore. Jacob walked in my front door barreling towards me on the couch.

" Bella." He looked and sighed at me. " I'm so glad you're home I missed you Seth, Embry, and Quil did too. Even Sam and Emily are asking about you."

" I'm fine Jacob. Please tell them that I don't need more people worrying about me."

" OK.." Jacob. My Jacob looked spent. He didn't need to feel this way, this was my hell not his.

" Do you wanna go to the beach? or we could just go to my house. Or what ever you want." He said suddenly.

I declined. I was being so selfish. Most of me didn't care I could feel myself change I wasn't the same Bella I was before.

Six months passed. I quit work, I declined all my college acceptances, and I hardly saw anyone. Jacob came over everyday, mostly just sitting with me while I felt sorry for myself. Angela and Ben came over every once in a while but they stopped coming around after a few months. Charlie never once said anything about it until now.

" Bella I will not sit here and watch you waste your life away! If you don't get yourself together in one month you are out. As much as I hate to do this it needs to be done. I will always love you though, that will never change." Charlie started at dinner one night.

" What do you expect me to do go away to college and forget this ever happened?" I said suddenly with passion.

" No I would never expect that I just want you to hang out with your friends at least. I want you to at least work on acting human."

" What?" My head snapped up. Acting human. Ha. I was reminded too much of my past life.

" Fine. I'll go see Jake tonight." I was desperate to forget what I was thinking.

" Well that's great Bells." Charlie Smiled widely.

I let Charlie clear the table and walked out to my car. As I drove to Jacob's house my mind was somewhere else. I didn't see the deer run across the road in time. It was too fast to even remember, I blacked out as I crashed into a tree. I remember sections of what happened. It was like a movie everything was blurry and real fast. There were two people there. A small girl and a man, or was I imagining it? The small girl put me in the car and the man pushed the car back on the road. What was happening? I tried to open my eyes to see who was helping me but all to fast I was at Jacob's house. Jacob and Billy were outside. I felt my mouth moving but I didn't hear anything

" Bella it's okay you just hit your head hard." Billy said reassuringly.

Jacob laid me out on the couch and gave me a pack of ice. He rubbed my arm. It felt really nice I hadn't felt very warm in a long time.

" I'm confused..how did I get here?" I asked when I came to.

They both looked at me strangely. " You drove here Bella. Thank god you didn't get in another accident. " Jacob said.

" Huh. I don't remember." I looked out the window to my truck it only had a dent in the hood. I must have been dreaming about the people that helped me. My car was indestructible, I however am not. Why am I being so careless. Even if _they _- I couldn't bear to say their name - did not care about me other people still did.I had to bottle these feelings up. Maybe if I had really great luck they would eventually disappear.

" It's good to see you Jake." I laughed. I actually laughed. Maybe I was becoming hysterical. He gave me the best Jacob smile ever. It was the first ounce of goodness I felt in a long time.

Chapter 4

My insides still felt cold and my mind felt far away but I hung out with Jacob everyday. He didn't go to school anymore and when I asked him about it he didn't have much to say.

" Jake did you quit school to take care of me?" I said one day

" No of course not. I have a duty to the pack to watch out for things around here, I just happen to be free to be with you."

" The pack made you quit school?" I said skeptically.

" No but they don't mind. I'm not ageing so I can always go later on. I have important things to take care of now so school can wait."

I didn't believe him but I didn't press it harder he was right after all he wasn't aging. I however was and Charlie was bringing up college more and more frequently.

" Bella how about going to look at colleges?"

" Dad I don't think so. I don't think I'm ready to leave just yet. The only thing that is keeping me happy right now is Jake..what would I do without him?" I knew I wasn't completely happy but why disappoint him.

" Well at least go on some tours. I'm sure Jake wouldn't mind going. You could make a road trip out of it."

" I don't know if Jake would wanna do that." I bit my lip hoping he wouldn't make me ask him.

" What wouldn't I want to do?" Jake said as he bust in through my front door.

" Don't you knock any more?" I said bitterly.

" Bella thinks you wouldn't wanna take some campus tours with her."

" That actually sounds pretty cool. Plus I have a surprise!"

" And what's that?" I said with an edge still

" I got my GED! I can look at schools for myself too!"

" That's great Jake. Congratulations, although it would have been better it you just went to high school like a regular person." Just cusp he was a werewolf didn't mean that he had to stop having a normal life.

" A GED is fine for me. Let's go upstairs and download some college applications for me!"

" Okay I guess."

We got up into my room and he seemed to cut the happiness charade.

" Why didn't you tell me you were working on you're GED?" I was kind of irritated he hadn't told me.

" It was a surprise. So let's look at colleges."

" Jake I don't know. I don't want to go off alone to some place not familiar it would wreck all the progress I already made, even if it is only a little bit."

" Bella do you actually think I would let you go off somewhere by yourself? You would probably get yourself killed and I know you couldn't live without me for four years." He grinned.

" I guess it wouldn't be all that bad if you were there with me. Maybe we could even get an apartment."

" Sounds good to me. I think the pack could live without me if we went far."

" Oh well if you have to stay for the pack I understand."

I was looking for any excuse to not go away. On the outside I looked almost happy. I had a little color and spirit back in my life but not much. On the inside it wasn't much better. I had horrible nightmares every night, that is when I could sleep. Most nights I couldn't sleep and I would stare at the ceiling all night feeling the ache in my chest. During the day it wasn't much better. I didn't eat much which is why I was very skinny and I was always holding myself together. Charlie, Jake, and the pack were use to it though.

" They won't mind, believe me."

" Ok" I tried to sound casual " You can apply to colleges I already got accepted to"

" No problem you just take care of scheduling the tours."

The next few weeks me and Jake traveled to tour colleges. We went to Washington State, University of Buffalo, University of Alaska, Harvard, Brown, and Dartmouth. We both chose to go to Dartmouth. It wasn't too long ago that I actually considered going there anyways. When we got home I felt exhausted.

I was sitting up at night not able to sleep when I felt the urge to go for a drive. It was 4am, Charlie had already left so he wouldn't mind if I went out for a drive. I found my self driving down a familiar dirt road to a white house. The sun was just rising so the house looked kind of beautiful, but I couldn't believe I had ended up here. I felt my body crumble to the ground. Why was I here torturing myself like this? I had been almost a year since I had been here. I could feel the powerful emotions coming back to me but I fought back hard to keep them in. Maybe I was suppose to be here though. Maybe if I went inside I could have closure and I could move on with my life. Did I really want to move on with my life? Even though people thought I had gotten over the _them _a while ago when I was alone the act went away and I was left with myself and my memories.

I couldn't chance getting hurt again. I spun around and jumped in my car. I gunned it to 55 wishing I could go faster. I didn't want to be alone anymore so I went to the only place I felt safe and good. Jake's house.

I didn't knock at the Black's house anymore I just burst in and ran to Jake's room. He was still sleeping. I forgot it was only 6am.

" Whoa! What?" Jake jumped up startled.

" It's just me Jake I'm sorry."

" What are you doing here?" He said smiling. What a perv.

" I-I was just at their house" I said really fast.

He looked at me as if I was crazy and waited before he said anything.

" Why would you do that? Are you trying to torture yourself? And right before we leave for Dartmouth too."

" I didn't mean to go there but I ended up there anyways. Everything was the same...I-I came here because I didn't want to be by myself."

" What were you doing up?"

" You know I don't sleep very well..." I said looking at my feet.

" Oh yeah. Well It's fine we can stay here and hang out."

" No sleep you need rest you're not getting much sleep as it is."

We both lay on Jacob's bed, I barely fit on it though since Jacob was so big. It didn't feel uncomfortable laying with him when I knew he felt differently towards me than I did him, it just felt...right. Jacob's snoring lulled me into a dreamless sleep.

Chapter 5 leaving the nest.

Tomorrow I would leave for college. It was such a weird thought. I would miss Charlie terribly but the thing I would miss most I wouldn't admit to anyone. The reason I thrived in Forks was because I could always believe that _they _were real. I would take the pain it caused me to be near the memories to just believe vampires were real. I had to force myself to leave this place.

I came up with so many different excuses to why I shouldn't leave the state but Jake knew I would pull this and he didn't let me think about it often. We were non-stop getting ready to leave. We spent weeks buying things for our apartment and getting school supplies and jobs secured. Jacob of course insisted that he work for us. What were we a married couple? No doubt he wished that. Even through all the endless busy work I still felt my chest ache in ways I didn't think it could.

" You ganna be okay Bells?" Charlie said while hugging me at the airport.

" I don't know" I sighed " But I'll try my hardest."

" That's the spirit. If you need anything or need to come home anytime just let me know, I'll be there for you kid."

" Thanks dad, I love you." I held back crying and by the looks of it Charlie did too.

" Love you too Bella."

" Bye Billy I'll miss you too." I said and took Jacob's hand and went off.

I stepped out of the cab to see our new apartment. 1121 Penora St. I couldn't believe I lived on my own. I didn't want that much responsibility. My thoughts ran back to our flight here. I quite literally had a panic attack. The flight attendant looked scared. Thankfully Jacob took me into the bathroom to calm me down. It probably looked suspicious, two people going into the bathroom together but I didn't care.

" Bella you can do this. Look at me." Jacob said calmly.

" I'm...trying.." I said in between my gasping.

" Slow your breathing. Copy mine. Listen." He put my right hand to his chest so I could feel the breathing.

Me and Jake had become so close that people thought we were dating. The land lord even called me Mrs. Black. It didn't bother me to tell him we were just friends but I caught a look on Jake's face that made me think he didn't care so much that people thought we were together.

We walked up to the third floor. Our apartment was number 34. Before we walked in Jacob stood in front of the door.

" I forgot to tell you something. Now don't kill me ok?"

" What did you do Jacob?" I said glaring I knew that look. That meant I wasn't going to like what he did.

" Well we couldn't afford the rent by ourselves so I... got us a roommate!"

" What?" I growled " What were you thinking? We have too many secrets to be having some stranger living with us!"

" Shh. She's ganna hear you. Don't worry about it. We don't have bloodsuckers" I winced "in our life now and I'll only need to phase maybe once a month to keep myself from aging. We'll be fine."

" What is she going to think of me? I'm a wreck she's going to think I'm a total freak!"

" I'll explain you're..um..condition later if you want. Excluding the leeches."

" Fine. What's her name at least."

" It's Amber." He smiled and I couldn't help but smile back.

I walked in cautiously. Everything was set up, it looked beautiful. Amber was sitting on the couch watching Law and Order.

" Hi you guys! I'm Amber Sulley."

Amber is a 5'8 athletic blonde. She is way to peppy and is way too touchy feely. I thought that I caught her giving Jacob a look and couldn't help but feel jealous, Maybe I was just imagining it because I wanted a reason to hate her.

" Hi" Jacob and I said at the same time bringing a smile to both of our faces.

" Well I see you guys are really close already..We'll have to spend lots of time together so we can all be close."

" Yeah totally." Jacob said really fast and shot a worried look at me. I'm sure he knew I would feel jealous. Jake knew how I felt before I even felt it.

" Let me show you guys around. I set everything up for you guys and picked out your rooms, hope you don't mind."

" Of course not" I said to be polite but really who was this girl. She was the invited roommate not the one who invited us.

The apartment was nice, three rooms, one bathroom, a kitchen and dining room smooshed into one, and a living room with a huge L shaped couch and a plasma TV. My room was the nicest, so I couldn't be mad at Amber for picking it for me. It had double windows overlooking Dartmouth and a queen size bed. My book shelf was set up and ready for me to load my books onto. My desk was in the corner and had a new laptop on it with a bow and a note. It said ' Have fun at school, we know you'll be great'. Hmm weird. It must be from Charlie and Renee unless the school is really generous. I'd have to thank them later.

Jake's room was almost as nice as mine and nearly the same except it had a TV and video games in it. Weirdly enough it had a forest wallpaper on one side. How fitting, but how did this girl know how to set up our rooms. It was like she knew us.

" Hey Amber thanks for setting up our rooms they look great, you got us spot on."

" Your Welcome Bella I'm glad you like it. Oh and your father called for you just before you arrived."

" Thanks."

My cell was dead. Oops. Charlie picked up on the first ring.

" Hey Bella. Why didn't you call when you got in."

" I just got here like 5 minutes ago."

" Sorry. I just wanted to make sure you got there alright, so I guess I'll let you get settled in."

" Thanks. Oh wait I wanted to thank you and mom for the new laptop it was set up and everything on my desk."

" I didn't get you a laptop and neither did Renee"

" Oh I guess I ordered it and forgot. I'll talk to you later dad. Bye."

Who was the mystery laptop from? It was a little unnerving but I wasn't going to get myself upset about nothing it was probably a secret present from Jake.

Chapter 6 Strange call

After everything was settled in my room I went to go see if we needed to buy anything else for the apartment. I went to ask Amber if she got anything yet but before I could knock I heard something that made me think otherwise.

" Yeah they're all fine and settled. Bella looks like hell and Jake is really nice." Amber said quietly

I heard her on the phone talking about us to someone. Who the hell was she to be having a conversation like she knew us or something.

" Thanks again.." " Oh yeah sorry, it won't happen again."

I leaned in trying so hard to listen I lost my grip and fell on my face into her room.

" OH sorry! I tripped." I gasped my face getting red.

" It's fine Bella, no harm done." She smiled which made me really think she meant it. " I'll call you later ok? bye."

We both just stood there for a few seconds before we both tried saying something.

" So-"

" I-"

We both laughed.

" I'm sorry I barged in on your call I just came to ask you if we needed anything for the apartment."

" It's fine don't worry about it and no we don't need anything I bought everything we need. Don't worry about paying me back either my parents gave me the money."

Amber was strange but I guess if I had someone to talk to I would be gossiping the same way. I had to forget about it. I had class tomorrow and I promised Jake a night on the town.

I decided to unpack all my things, which took up only about two hours. My new dark green comforter and pillows looked great along with my shelf full of all my books. I made a mental note to go and look for a bookstore, I would need new books soon. My closet wasn't in very good shape though. It was still pretty warm here and all I had were winter clothes, since that's all I really needed in Forks. Maybe me and Amber could go shopping together. Ugh I winced at the idea. I was not good at girly stuff and Amber was as girly as anyone could get. Maybe Jake would come, it would be pretty funny to see.

I sat on my bed looking around satisfied. I heard Jake and Amber talking in the kitchen.

" So Jake it's been too long since we've chatted on the phone. How have you guys been?" Amber said clinking a coffee cup.

" Pretty busy I guess. It's hard to get things settled halfway across the country."

Amber giggled at him. How irritating. I didn't have a claim on Jacob by any means because we were not together but I still wanted a claim on him without having to be with him. No offense to Jake or anything I loved him, but as a brother. I don't think I could ever love someone again. I had my time of being in love and it seemed that was all I was allowed.

" Oh hey Bella." Jake said as I came in. " Made you some coffee."

" Thanks Jake." I smiled.

" So Bella tell me about yourself." Amber looked on with wide eyes. I'm sure she was hoping to hear something to gossip about..but then again maybe I was wrong about her I did just meet her.

" Well I lived in Phoenix for most of my life and then I moved in with my dad in Forks 3 years ago. What about you?"

" Oh I've lived in the same place with both my parents for my whole life..untill now that is. Manhattan is the only place I would ever want to live. I'm an only child too. I so wish mom and dad decided to have more kids, I've always wanted a sister!"

" I'm an only child too." I said flatly not really interested in the conversation.

" What about you Jake?" Amber said casually.

" I have two sisters. I don't see them that much though. And me and Bella have known each other since we were babies but I've stayed in Forks."

" That's so nice. It's very rare to be best friends with someone your whole life in the upper east side you know." Ohhh so Amber was one of those girls.

" Yes so rare." I said with an edge. I almost felt sorry enough to say sorry.

Luckily our phone rang before anyone could say anything. I jumped at it.

" Hello?"

" Hey, Bella?"

" Seth?"

" Hey! How's it goin?" You could always count on Seth to be happy to see you.

" I'm fine, kind of exhausted how are you?"

" Pretty good I miss you and Jake already I knew I shouldn't have hung out with you guys that much before you left!" He said jokingly.

"You have to come up and visit us. It'll be great."

" Yeah just name a date, I'm sure the other guys will wanna come up to."

" Uhh I don't think there will be enough room for all of you huge wolves in here at the same time."

I laughed but then stopped when I realized I called them wolves. I spun around stunned to look at Jake who was trying to act like nothing happened and Amber who looked confused.

" What can I say she thinks we're animals!" Jake shrugged.

" So Bella is Jake there? I need to talk to him." I don't think Seth even noticed the pause.

" Yeah why is something wrong?"

" Nope just ganna catch him up on some things. All the guys say hi by the way."

" Here he is. Tell them I say hi too."

" Jake, Seth wants to talk to you."

I watched Jacob on the phone for a half hour. He looked casual most of the time but for a little while he looked distressed. I would have to get him alone to find out what was going on in the wolf world.

" So Bella do you have anything planned for today? I need to go shopping." Amber said matter of factly. I hadn't even noticed her there she was so quiet.

" Actually no, I need to get some things too"

" It's settled then a girls day out! Jake you'll be fine here alone right?"

I looked to Jacob with a martyred face while he laughed. He didn't take pity on me.

" Yeah I'll be fine, we can go out later to dinner Bella."

Chapter 7 Girl Talk

Amber and I had spent five long, miserable hours shopping. I was lying to myself of course it wasn't all that bad. It was nice to have a girlfriend to talk to about boys. After I bought shorts, jeans, tanks, shirts, shoes, new underwear, new bras, and some skirts that Amber made me buy we sat down to drink cappuccinos and talk. I suspected Amber had been waiting all day to ask me about Jake.

" So are you two together?" Amber raised her eyebrows.

" No, not in the traditional sense."

" What's that suppose to mean Bella come on!" She didn't look satisfied.

" Well We're the best friends anyone could ever be. He knows what I'm feeling before I do and he knows the things I don't have to tell him."

" But do you like him?"

" Yes but as a friend."

" I see the way you both look at each other I just think you don't want to admit it to yourselves!"

" Jake loves me unconditionally but he knows I don't feel the same way about him."

" One day you'll see." She ended that part of the conversation rather smugly.

Maybe I was just imaging that she liked Jake, she seemed to be really trying to get us together. Who did she think she was anyways? She did not know me. I mean I think I would know if I felt that way about Jake. The one time he kissed me though-even though it was borderline assault- I thought about it for a while even though I refused to admit it. I didn't want to think any further. I mean seriously what would it mean if I have just been to suborn to admit my feelings for him. I made myself stop. I'd think about it some other time when I was not under the scrutinizing eye of Amber.

" Well we should go if you and Jake are going to make it to dinner tonight." She stood up looking at me.

" Oh yeah,yeah." I was startled after being deep in thought and I think she knew. I shook it off.

On the way back to the apartment Amber let me in on the great places to eat. I decided we would go to a burger place called oddly enough ' Burger Palace'. After Jake and I could either go to a club called 'Club Diablo' or a theater where they had student plays every night. I wasn't much for clubs but I was trying to change my life so why not right?

Once Amber and I got back to the apartment Jake was waiting. He looked really great. He was wearing a tight black shirt and jeans with oil stains on them. Classic Jacob but somehow different. I let my eyes linger on the spot of skin exposed on his stomach when he reached his arms up to stretch.

" Ready to go Bella?" He said happily.

I blinked kind of confused. What was that about?

" Uh.. yeah. Let me change real quick."

I ran to my room. For some reason I wanted to look good and that would be the exact opposite of what I looked like now. I looked at myself in the mirror disapprovingly. I had bags under my shallow eyes, my hair was uncombed and a little frizzy, my clothes were very loose and dull looking. I panicked and then remembered I live with Amber.

" Amber?" I poked my head out of my door.

" I'm in the kitchen Bella!"

" Can you come here?"

I heard her fast foot steps to my door. I looked at her and somehow she knew exactly what I wanted.

" Let's pick out an awesome outfit!"

We picked out my new pair of skinny jeans and a fitted white cotton shirt. Amber even did my make up and hair. Not to much makeup, just some foundation to even out my skin tone and get rid of the bags,blush, and cherry chapstik. My hair was even simple but great. I had light wavy curls. I looked great I had to admit to myself even if it was hard to look at myself in the mirror.

" So.. I take it you changed your mind about Jake?" Amber said while she was doing my makeup and hair at lightning speed.

" No. I just felt like looking special tonight."

" Okkkaayy." She rolled her eyes.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 8

When Amber and I walked into the kitchen Jake got up after looking really bored.

" Wow Bells you look great!"

" Thanks."

" Let's go. Bye Amber."

When we were in the car Jake still looked distracted. I suspected it was the change in my outfit. I hadn't really gotten ready for anything in more than a year. It surprised me that I was being like this, some hormonal girl.

Dinner was good I had a cheese burger and fries and naturally, Jake had 5 double cheeseburgers and 5 fries. I remember when he first turned into a werewolf, it surprised me how much he ate it was unnatural. Even though people stared at him when he got so much I didn't care I was used to it. I'd bet anything he was still hungry even after eating so much food.

" So What did you and Seth talk about on the phone today?" I eyed him making sure I didn't miss any facial expressions.

" Nothing really, usual pack stuff. A few nomadic vampires were passing through but they didn't catch them in time."

" Oh okay, you just seemed a little worried."

" Well...the pack has grown. A kid named Colin, only 12. We thought when there wasn't anymore vampires in town the pack would stop growing but that's not the case."

" I'm sorry it must suck to see all you're friends go through that."

" It's fine nothing to worry about. Let's just have a nice time tonight." He said with a smile.

" So where should we go now? I've picked two choices. We could go to a club or we could go see a student play." I said watching Jake eat his last cheese burger.

" Dance club? Well well look who's changing!" He grinned.

" This is supposedly suppose to be the time of my life..so choose something and shut up!"

" I'd rather go to the club. Plays are so dull unless it's real gorey. Is it?" He looked way to hopeful.

" I think it's Shakespeare sorry."

My stomach was suddenly twisting into knots on the way to the club. This was so not me. Maybe Jake won't make me dance.

Club Diablo was dark and smelt of smoke and sweat. I could feel my body thrumming to the loud bass in the background of the music. I felt Jake take my hand and lead me to the bar.

" Drink?" He yelled over the music.

" We don't have id's genius!" I screamed in his ear.

He pulled out two fake id's. I grinned. It felt good to be rebellious, it was like I was throwing away any promises I ever made to anyone-since I knew they weren't keeping them either.

The night had gone by so fast. Laying in my bed waiting to pass out I tried to remember when I had gotten so out of control.

Most of the night I spent in the lounge getting drunk while Jake socialized and I hmmd and ahhd at the right moments. After a few drinks I grabbed Jake and led him to the crowded dance floor. We danced with our bodies pressed together to the beat for hours. I could feel that stare Jacob looked at me with when he wanted to tell me he loved me but I didn't want to acknowledge it, I just looked into his eyes and kissed him on the cheek and giggled.

I don't remember the specifics but I know Jake was worried about me I had ALOT to drink. It made every hollow feeling go away. Embarrassingly enough he had to carry me into the apartment and to my bed.

I remember the feelings when we were dancing but I didn't want to say them out loud. What would it mean to love Jake like that? It would change everything, and I wonder how he would feel to know that he is the second best to what I could have ever had. I vaguely remember when I contemplated being with Jacob a couple years back when- I skipped over his name- left. Jake has loved me unconditionally and that is the best I could ever hope for, right? He knows I'm broken but he still loves me and it makes me feel great I have someone there for me, but then again he won't wait for me forever. Someday he might find another girl that loved him back. This brought my thoughts to Amber and how I thought she liked Jake. Without even thinking I went to Jake's room.

I walked right in without even knocking which was a bad idea. Right in front of me was Jacob and Amber. Jacob with his shirt off, only in his boxers and Amber in some quite revealing pajamas. They were just laying there on his bed looking up at the ceiling, talking.

I started to back out and close the door when it squeaked and they both sat up looking embarrassed.

" Umm sorry. I didn't know-" I blushed and stopped talking because truthfully I didn't know what was going on but I had a hunch.

" Bella-" Jake started to say but I stopped him with a wave of my hand.

" Really it's fine I should have knocked. Goodnight guys."

Chapter 9

The weekend was over and school was starting. I was looking looking at his feet.

I thought carefully about what my next wforward to getting out of the apartment. I spent the rest of the weekend talking awkwardly to Jake and Amber while also avoiding them. None of us spoke about what happened Friday night though. They didn't even attempt to get out of the bed when I left, they just continued what they were doing. I guess Jake really has moved on.

After a lot of thought I chose to be a Veterinarian. It was as close to what Carlisle did. I think I'm to clumsy to be dealing with people so animals were the next best thing.

Every now and then, now anyways, I liked to think about my ex-second family- except him, for now-. We had so many good times it's hard not to think back on them. Carlisle was one of my heroes, Jane Austen being the second. I would do anything to do right by Carlisle even though he wasn't here now. Hey, maybe I might even try my hand at designing like Esme.

I grabbed a mug of coffee and walked to my first class, Anatomy. Anatomy wasn't anything special until that is, someone came walking towards me that did not look human. My eyes widened with panic.

" Hey is this seat taken?" He said

For a few seconds I just stared without anything to say. " Uh yeah, sure"

" Are you okay? You look kinda sick."

" No I'm fine." Truthfully I wasn't fine. This guy was a vampire. I wonder if he knew I knew or not, he did look kind of nervous, not like the typical tough vampire.

" I'm Adam Hall by the way" He held out his hand to me willingly.

" Bella Swan." I held his hand firmly letting him know I wasn't uncomfortable with his cold, hard hand.

" So what's you're major?" Adam whispered as the teacher started talking.

" I'm ganna be a Veterinarian. What about you?"

" I'm going to get my doctorate and be a great doctor!" He said so proud of himself.

It reminded me so much of Carlisle. Actually Adam kind of looked like Carlisle. He had a strong build, muscular but not too muscular and he had blond hair just like his. I ran my eyes up and down his body soaking up every detail and noticed for the first time he had the same butterscotch eyes as vegetarian vampires did.

" You remind me of some friends of mine Adam." I said sounding distracted.

" Yeah, who are these friends of yours Miss Swan" He said casually.

" The Cullen's. Maybe you've met them before?"

At first he didn't show any emotion but then he narrowed his eyes at me, almost like he as trying to see into my mind. I knew even if that was what he was really trying to to, he couldn't. Maybe that's why he looked just the tiniest bit worried.

" We should meet after class it seems you know a little bit too much about me."

" That's fine. My last class is at 2, text me where you want to meet." I grinned with a new confidence.

I couldn't concentrate all through my other classes. What a coincidence that I meet a vampire here of all places, going to school! He knew the Cullen's, that much I knew. He wouldn't have knew what I was talking about if he didn't know them. Maybe he could tell me where they were or what they were doing. If he knew, I could always go and visit them maybe. I'm sure they still cared about me enough to know how I was doing. That's when Adam texted me.

" Meet me outside. We can go to your place right?"

" Yeah be out in 5" I texted back not caring that class wasn't over for another half hour.

I was quiet on the way to my apartment. Jake and Amber would be home by now and I was nervous about what they would think.

" I have 2 roommates just so you know. And the girl doesn't know anything about...you."

" okie dokie."

Before we even walked in I heard Jake gasp through the door. I threw Adam a look the said ' I'm sorry' before I opened the door. I stood in the door way watching as Jake stood in front of Amber protectively.

" Jake. This is Adam, he's in one of my classes." I looked him in the eyes making sure he knew it was safe.

" Hi." He said tight lipped. " You know it's getting a little to crowded in here for me I'll be in my room."

" Hi Adam! I'm Amber nice to meet you! Isn't Bella just the greatest?"

" Yeah she is" He said looking at me.

" I'm going to see what's wrong with Jake. See you both later"

I could hear Jake in his room. His anger was flaring and I'm sure he would send Amber out so she wouldn't get hurt or see him if he lost control. I led Adam to my room so we could have some privacy.

" So Bella.."

" I know what you are it's ok."

" How? And how do you know the Cullen's?"

" How do you know the Cullen's?" I challenged.

" Well I met Carlisle and his wife Esme before and after that I met the rest of the family. Carlisle has been kind of a father figure and a hero, even though we only met briefly. I was traveling by myself after being made. I was confused, they took me in, made me comfortable and helped me understand the rules. I was awed by the lifestyle they chose to live by and wanted it for myself. I left them a few months ago to get a place here and start school."

" They have always tried to do the best..." I was stuck in thought for a few moments before Adam spoke.

" Hey I do recognize you! Bella Swan. Carlisle and Esme talked of you often they had a few pictures of you around the house. I can't believe I didn't notice until now!"

Right when he said that I was both happy and sad so I started to cry. Embarrassing crying too, I wasn't just crying I was sobbing loudly. So they still did care. If I could not be with them at least we all had a place in each other's hearts. Jake burst through the door before I could say anything else.

" What's going on in here?" He was shaking and was about to break the door off the hinges.

" Nothing we were just talking." Adam looked at me anxiously. " Bella what's up with this guy?"

" Excuse me? If you don't get away from her right this second you will no longer have a head!"

" Jacob stop! We were talking he didn't do anything wrong!" I said clearing my eyes and throat.

They both stood up facing each other. It was like before but with a different vampire now. Jacob cowered over Adam but Adam still looked fierce.

" Look I don't know who you are or who you _think _you are but this is none of your business. We were just talking about some friends we had in common."

Jacob looked at me knowing who he was talking about. I could see all the things he wanted to say.

" Are they back?" He said quietly to me. I shook my head no. " Well no offense to you _Adam _but I'm in the same league you are so don't mess with me. Oh and the Cullen's are not welcome here, pass it along."

" Ok let's all just sit down and talk about this. We can be mature right?" I didn't want this to get out of hand for no reason.

" Yeah sure Bella." Adam said looking casual again.

" You think you're better than me bloodsucker?" Jacob was shaking still

" Jake calm down I don't want you to regret anything." I stared at his hands anxiously.

" I care about you too Bella, but I'm not going to act like a lap dog."

" Jake c'mon you know he was just being polite. Why don't you go hang out with Amber for a while I'll be fine here."

Jake walked off defeated without saying a word. I would deal with his feelings later but if I hadn't done anything there would be a wolf and a vampire fighting in my room right now. I looked up to Adam feeling embarrassed by Jacob's lack of respect for Adam.

" what's his problem?"

" This probably feels like deja vu to him, He doesn't like vampires, actually they are his mortal enemies. But you're a vegetarian so it shouldn't be a problem right?"

" Yeah but why are we his mortal enemies?"

" He's a...werewolf."

" No way! For real? I didn't even know they existed."

" Yeah well, where were we?" I didn't want to get into the subject of werewolf's right now.

" How you know the Cullen's"

" Oh yeah well we were really close for a while. They were a second family to me."

" How did that come about, you don't usually see vampires being so close with humans. especially a human like you. You smell so good, like freesia."

" I get that a lot" I laughed " Carlisle and Esme's son Edward and I sort of fell in love. We were always together, and Alice was my best friend. They left though..I haven't seen then in more than a year."

Now that I said Edward's name out loud it didn't hurt. Maybe the worst was over. I had gotten past him leaving, I pretty much put him and my feelings in the back of my mind. It did no good to think of him, I would just get myself in trouble again but I never thought I would be able to say his name out loud and talk about him.

" Wow. I actually haven't met Edward but I heard he is pretty great."

" He wasn't with them?"

" No neither was Alice and her husband Jasper. Carlisle and Esme were by themselves most of the time but Emmett and Rosalie came once in a while."

" That's strange they must be together somewhere."

" From what I heard they were living apart, no on has spoken to Edward in a long time, I guess they all had this huge falling out."

" Oh." Was all I could say. " Adam I kinda wanna be by myself, not to be rude. Can we hang out another time?"

" Yeah sure Bella. I'll call you or just see you in class."

I could tell he knew I needed time alone. It looked like I wouldn't get my time alone though. When Adam walked out Jacob was right outside with his hands across his chest.

Chapter 10

" Not now Jacob." I said stern faced.

" Bella c'mon I'm calm now I just want to talk." In his defense he really did look sorry.

" Fine." I said walking back into my room.

Jacob closed the door behind him and looked back at me unwillingly.

" Listen Bella I'm sorry how I handled that. It just fired me up that another vampire was in your life again. I don't wanna see you get hurt."

" It's nice that you're looking out for me and everything but (A) I can take care of myself and (B) he's just a friend, nothing to worry about. It's not like I'm going to fall in love with him.

" Well It's happened before.." He saords were going to be. I have thought so long about how I really feel about Jacob and I figured out that it was love all along. Not just some school girl crush but real love. He was meant to be my soul mate from the beginning but our future got messed up when Edward came into the picture, who was my eternal love. Jacob was my everything now. Up until now somewhere in the back of my mind I hoped Edward would come back for me but I had to realize this was a false hope. I decided to go off course of our conversation and ask him about Friday night.

" Jake..."

" Yeah?" He said looking up.

" Do you like Amber?" I said quietly.

" Oh this is about Friday isn't it?"

" Yes. If you guys like each other then it's fine really, I didn't expect you to love me forever. You had to move on some time right?"

" It's not like that at all. I swear. Wait why do you care if I still love you or not?"

" Because maybe I like you Jake. Maybe I've liked you for a while but haven't let myself believe it until now."

We stared into each other's eyes for a few seconds, that's when Jake brushed a strand of hair off my face and grabbed my face with both his hands. I could feel my face tingle under his skin. Before I could say anything Jake kissed me. At first it was soft and beautiful. His lips so warm on mine. Nothing like cold stone forming around my lips, his lips were perfect like they were meant to move with mine. Then the kiss turned into a fierce fast kiss like he couldn't get enough of me. I could feel my head getting dizzy and I was losing my breath.

In the back of my mind It reminded me kind of what it felt like to kiss Edward. Not as potent by any means but it was great. I tried with all my will to push the Edward images to the back of my mind where I could forget them.

Too soon Jacob stopped kissing me. He looked like he was feeling the same as me. He was so still with his eyes closed. Why had it taken me this long to figure out I loved him. Of course, I didn't want to tell him I loved him just yet it would make him to eager. I would wait till the right time.

" I've waited so long to do that."

" It was perfect." I whispered.

" _That _should have been our fist kiss."

Before I could forget about the Amber thing I unwillingly asked him.

" But wait Jake, what about you and Amber."

He smiled " She came in to ask what was up with you. I told her about the night and how I felt about you. She told me I shouldn't give up just yet. It looks like she was right." He laughed quietly.

" But you were both wearing practically nothing! You guys didn't even bother to leave each other after I left."

" Bella you passed out in your room 5 minutes later. She did leave but you were to drunk to notice." He said pulling me closer.

" Oh"

How embarrassing. It's just like me to make a big deal out of nothing. Before I could feel anymore sorry for myself he pulled me into a hug and kissed me again. Things were going to be very different from now on.

Chapter 11

" We'll be in at noon dad. Who's going to be picking us up?"

" Me and Billy will be there don't worry. We're so excited to have you guy back."

It had been two weeks since Jake and I kissed. We weren't officially together but we might as well have been. We spent a good portion of our time holding hands and sneaking kisses. We had a week off of school and decided to go home and make our parents happy. We were even bringing Amber and Adam along since they weren't going home.

" Don't forget that Amber and Adam are coming with us so have some clean blankets for them."

" Yeah I know. I'm not completely helpless you know."

" Sorry. Well we gatta go our flight takes off in a little bit. bye love you!"

I was a bit stressed going back to Forks. I was scared it would ruin what I have with Jake, being back where I have all the memories with the Cullen's and all. Jake knew I was stressed but tried to reasurre me that I would be fine and we would spend the whole time together so I wouldn't have to be by myself to think of anything.

When we got to the Seattle airport we were immediately greeted by Charlie, Billy, and the whole pack. I resisted holding on to Jake because we hadn't told anyone about us yet.

I could tell that Amber and Adam felt a little out of place so I went to introduce them. Clearly the pack didn't need to be introduced.

" Everyone this is Amber and Adam." I said as everyone shook hands.

" This must be hard for you being in the country since you're so use to the city Amber." Charlie said

" Yeah I'm sure I'll get used to it though you all seem real great." She said happily, I almost believed her.

" And where are you from Adam?" Sam made a point to ask.

" I'm from Oregon" He said wearily.

I briefed him on the rest of the pack so he wouldn't be surprised. I was also surprised that's where he is from. He wouldn't tell me where he was with the Cullen's because he knew my history with them and what it did to have them leave. I didn't keep secrets from Adam. We hung out a lot now, It felt familiar and kind of nice to have a vampire friend. He looked at me as I gave him a look that meant we'll talk later.

" Ok well let's all get out of here its still two hours home."

I walked behind everyone else so I could hold on to Jake for reassurance. I could feel myself numbing my mind.

My room was the same. I felt good to be home for a little while but at the same time I didn't want to be there. All the painful memories flooded back into my mind. I didn't even hear Jake and Adam come in until Jake put his hand on my shoulder.

" Are you all right Hun?"

I turned to see Jake and Adam looking at me.

" Y-yeah I'm fine." I said still staring at nothing. " Hey let's go see if there is a bonfire going on at the beach tonight Adam and Amber would love it." I said trying to change the subject.

" I don't know if that's such a good idea Bella." Jake said glancing at Adam, I immediately remembered that vampires weren't aloud on Quileute land.

" Oh yeah I forgot. No vampires on Quileute land. Well we can find something else to do, I wouldn't want to inconvenience the rest of the pack anymore than I already have."

I was pathetic all I ever did was feel sorry for myself. Forks was bringing the worst out of me but this was my home so I swallowed the feelings.

We all ate dinner at my house, pizza because Charlie still didn't know how to cook, except for Adam he took a slice and went up stairs to " make a call home". I was silent most of the time being deep in thought. I wasn't selfish enough to ignore people who talked to me though. Mostly just Seth and Jake making small talk with me, they knew me to well to know that I was not alright. Emily politely asked how I was doing lately and I politely said fine thanks back.

It was Sam who tried to cheer me up by giving me a surprise.

" Bella how would you guys like to come down to La Push and have a fire on the beach with us."

" No I don't think so I wouldn't want to leave Adam behind."

" He can come we've talked it over and decided as long as he stays in our sight he's welcome to come for the night." He smiled hoping I would cheer up.

" Really? That's great Sam thanks! I should call Angela and see if she's in town for the week too!"

Everyone could see it made me cheer up. The atmosphere wasn't awkward conversation now, it was relaxed. Everyone knew quite well that when I was upset they should steer clear of anything that would upset me.

Too my surprise Angela and Mike were home for the week too. I couldn't wait to see them, yes even Mike, I wanted to feel normal.

At eight o' clock we all met up at first beach. The pack were already there with the fire started. I could tell they were nervous having Adam there but I knew he wouldn't harm anyone.

Amber was the most excited I ever saw her. She admitted that she never had a bonfire. That was so strange to hear for all of us, but then again we didn't live in the city all our lives. Adam stayed out of the spot light most of the time aware that he was being watched. I surprised myself by running up to Mike and Angela hugging them both. Jake came up and stood possevily next to me with his arm around my waist. I think everyone was confused except Adam and Amber of course because they knew we were together.

I sat on the drift wood next to the fire feeling relaxed.

" So Bella how is school?" I heard Mike sit next to me.

" It's fine I live in an apartment with Amber and Jake so it's pretty fun."

" Oh yeah I remember that guy. Amber is nice too. Who is that other guy, he reminds me of Cullen."

I winced " That's my friend Adam, He's a distant cousin of the Cullen's actually I met him at school." I lied casually

" That's weird."

" Yeah I know" I smiled. I had a way of meeting strange people.

" So what's with Jacob?"

" I don't know just ignore it, I do" I laughed.

" I missed you Bella." He looked into my eyes leaning in for a kiss.

" Mike-"

Before I could say anything Jake was in between us and ready to kill Mike. Really it wasn't his fault because for all he knew I was single.

" What the-" Mike said surprised.

" Don't touch her you idiot." Jake said darkly

" Jake really it's fine!" I said pushing him away from Mike.

" No it's not he was ganna kiss you!" He looked at me like he wanted permission to kill him.

" He didn't know Jake, just leave it." I said quietly. Honestly I don't know why we were keeping what we had a secret but it was getting difficult with Jake always watching me when I was with guys.

" Didn't know what?" Mike said innocently

" We're together so that means HANDS OFF." He screamed in his face.

I was embarrassed. The first time I see Mike in over a year and he almost gets beat up by Jake.

" That's enough Jake really let's go for a walk." I said quietly not wanting to attract anymore attention since kids we didn't know were showing up.

" Sorry!" I mouthed to Mike.

I could see Embry and Quil laughing at the scene Jake made. I swatted them on the head as I went by them. This is so not funny.

I shivered noticing it was really cold outside. Jake slipped his hand in mine and leaned into me to warm me. It felt so good but I was trying to be mad at him right now and he always made it so hard.

" Jake was that really necessary It's not like I was actually going to kiss him you know."

" Yeah I know but it made me so mad. I just remembered the time we went to the movies together and he was trying to get you to be all over him. So pathetic."

" If I remember correctly you did the same thing, idiot." I laughed.

We decided to leave early with Adam but Amber wanted to stay and hang out with Mike. They were getting quite close when we left. I was glad I got to spend at least a little while with everyone. Angela looked great and her and Ben were even engaged!

Amber called around 1 am and said she was sleeping over at " Angela's house". Ew. I knew that meant she was spending the night with Mike.

I spent an hour tossing and turning before, like he read my mind, Jake came through my 12

" I couldn't sleep." He stood before me looking shy.

" Me either, I'm glad you came over." I smiled.

Both of us eager to be by each other again we ran an gave one another a hug.

" You're cold. C'mon" He tucked me in bed.

" You can get in too you know I'll be even warmer with you in here." I smiled.

I couldn't help but remember when I would lay in this same bed with Edward, but he couldn't be that close to me when I was cold since he would make me even colder.

Jake looked so comfortable and in the moment I couldn't help but kiss him. Fast and passionate. It left me feeling dizzy. He howled to be funny but I knew it also meant he liked it too. I giggled then sat up straight when I heard Charlie grumble and start walking to my room.

" Jake get up!"

He was tangled in the bedding and stumbled onto the ground right as Charlie came in. I thought he was going to spontaneously combust. He kept looking back and forth from me in my Victoria secret silk pajamas and Jake in nothing but cut off jean shorts.

" What is going on in here?" He yelled so loud it hurt my ears.

" N-Nothing dad. He had to bring me something." I said lamely

" C'mon Charlie were weren't doing anything wrong. You did say you always wanted us to be together." He smiled innocently. I knew that Charlie likening Jake would not get him out of it this time.

" You came to bring Bella something at 1am with no shirt on?" He said still raising his voice. " Wait you to are dating?"

" Yes." I whispered.

" I'm happy for you two but if you think I'm going to forget this ever happened you can forget about it! Get out now Jake. I'll call Billy in the morning."

Billy wouldn't care, he knew Jake was out all night with only shorts on and he came to see me all the time but I also knew he would pretend to be mad at least.

After Jake left I knew I would be in for it but surprisingly Charlie just stalked off to his room and went back to bed. I had six days left in Forks and Charlie said the morning after that I was to spend it with him. That meant no Jake. It was unfair but we would be together once we left so I didn't press it.

Nothing exciting happened the rest of the week except that Amber spent every waking moment with Mike. I personally didn't see what she saw in him but what ever, she did this with a lot of boys. Adam spent a lot of time with Jake. That was surprising too I guess. I asked Adam how he could stand to be with a smelly wolf all the time and he politely said 'What smell?'. I laughed at that but I knew he just wanted to be nice. All of that didn't matter because in 8 hours we would all be back at school and it would be regular again.

We got home really late but before I could go to bed Jacob wanted to talk to me.

" What's up?" I said tired

" I just wanted to see if you were alright. I know it wasn't the best for you to be back in Forks."

" Yeah I'm fine now."

" Yes now we can forget the past and live our lives." He smiled and kissed me goodnight.

Chapter 13

I woke up from the most wonderful dream I had ever had and wanted to tell Jake but then I remembered it was my 23rd birthday. I hated getting older since Jake never got any older. I tried to persuade him to stop phasing every month so he would start aging again but he said the pack needed him still. Yeah right, he was half way across the country and he hardly ever saw them. It was a sore subject that I brought up regularly. It didn't look weird though since Jake looked like he was 25.

My roommates and I were graduating college in one week and all I could think about was my dream. I ran to Jake's room to tell him.

" Jake! Wake up!" I jumped on him.

" W-what babe" He said heavily with sleep.

" I had the most wonderful dream do you want to hear about it?"

" Why are you so awake right now? It's 7 in the morning!"

" Because. Just let me tell you." I said grumpily.

He saw how excited I was about the dream so he sat up and lifted me into his lap.

" Ookay tell me." He smiled

" You took me on the most romantic date, that was perfect by the way, and then we came back here and you made me a chocolate Sunday and instead of a cherry on top was a ring! The most beautiful ring, and then you got down on one knee and purposed!"

I was bouncing up and down before I could finish. Usually I had dreams that came true so I was excited about this one. Jake just looked dumbfounded at me.

" That sounds really great Bella."

Before he could ruin the feeling I had and say I shouldn't get my hopes up I pulled down his face so I could kiss him. He grabbed me and pushed me on the bed before I could resist.

" I love you Jacob."

" I love you too Bella."

After that everything blurred at the edges. He kissed my lips and then my neck. I could feel my skin tingle where he touched me. So carefully he pulled off my clothes and kissed me from head to toe. We had made love so many times before but it still felt like the first time with him. Even though I was completely in love with Jake every time we made love my mind wandered to what it would have been like with Edward Cullen. My distant ex-boyfriend. I would never lead on to Jake that I was thinking that, it would crush him. Plus we both agreed he was in the past and he wasn't ever coming back so why think about him.

We were laying naked in the rays of sunlight coming through his window when Amber burst through the door.

" Gees don't you knock ever?" Jake said covering me up.

I loved when he did that, always being my protector. Amber did barge in a lot though.

" Sorry you weren't in you're room. How was I suppose to know you guys were having sex again. God you two are like rabbits."

" We are not!" I laughed "I'll be ready to leave in 10 minutes." I said as I through a pillow at her.

" Missed!" Amber said through the door.

" Do you really have to go to class today?" Jake complained.

" Yes I have an exam and you should go too." I kissed the top of his head and left to get dressed.

I quickly dressed in my faded jeans, a brown v neck shirt, brushed through my hair, and grabbed some coffee before heading out the door with Amber.

We were right outside the medical building where my test was when I saw her. It looked like- I couldn't even say it but I ran to catch up with her anyways just to see. Amber yelled after me.

" Bella what are you doing! We're going to be late!" She didn't follow after me and I didn't care.

" Hey-" I touched the girls arm to get her attention. She was cold as ice. She spun around and looked horrified.

"Alice?"

Chapter 14

"Bella." She whispered.

Before I could say anything else she was pacing away.

"Wait!"

What was wrong with her? I hadn't seen her in 5 years and she treated me like the plague. I ran after her but I knew it was no use when she was out of sight she would run at vampire speed away from here. I ran back to Amber to tell her who I just saw when I remembered I hadn't told her who the Cullen's where.

" Amber I gatta go."

" Are you crazy what about the exam? You'll fail!"

I thought it through and decided to go. I sent Adam a text before the test started.

_Bella To Adam : Guess whos bak? Mt me IMMEDIATLY aftr exam! DONT tell jake!_

_Adam To Bella: b there_

After I finished the exam I was pretty sure I failed. I couldn't think straight. I wanted desperately to find Alice. I definitely couldn't tell Jake, he would be worried about me. Adam would get it.

I saw Adam sitting on a bench outside the exam building.

" What's up Bells?"

I sat silently for 5 minutes before I said anything.

"I saw Alice Cullen." I said flatly, I was on the verge of crying.

" She's here? Are they all here? If I knew her scent I could find her, I'm sorry."

" It's fine Adam really. Why didn't she want to talk to me though. I mean I know they left me and everything but we were best friends, almost sisters! I loved her so much."

I couldn't stop the tears from spilling out of my eyes.

"I'll go around and try to find her scent if you want me too. Vampires smell different from humans anyways."

" Could you? I just wanna see how she's doing I might not even talk to her. If you can even find her she'll probably see you coming."

" Why didn't she see you coming then?" He said putting his arms around me.

" She can't see werewolves and I'm with Jake all the time." I said lamely.

" Oh and don't tell Jake he doesn't like them anymore." I said before leaving to go back home.

When I got back to the apartment the lights were off and tea candles were on the floor leading a path to my bedroom. Oh. My. God. Could this be it? Could my dream be real?

I opened my bedroom door to find Tiger lilies, my favorite flowers, covering every inch of my room. I gasped, it was so beautiful. Jake came out of my closet with a chocolate sundae with a ring on top.

" Jake" I said in awe with tears in my eyes.

He got on one knee and I almost collapsed.

" Isabella Swan I have loved you since the first time I saw you. We are soul mates and we're meant to be together. Will you spend forever with me?"

I inched closer looking down at the ring. Did I want to spend the rest of my life with Jake or did I want to find Alice and see if Edward was with her. I hadn't seen Edward in over 5 years and he did leave me but he was the love of my life. I realized in that moment that I had been waiting for him this whole time. He was always in the back of my mind and if he came here right now and begged me to take him back I would, as heartless as that is. I decided right then to commit totally to Jake. I wouldn't wait around anymore.

" Yes!" I squealed and ran into his arms.

" I was going to do this a little differently and at another time but you had that dream so I had to think of something else." He said with his face in my hair.

" It was great."

Amber walked through the door then and ran to hug me. We both screamed and jumped up and down. This was out of character for me but I was happy. If I even thought of marriage a few years ago I would laugh and say not me, never.

" We have to start planning! When is going to be?" Amber said bouncing around.

" I don't know we just got engaged. chill." She reminded me so much of Alice.

" Congratulations man" Adam said to Jake as he came through the door. " Can I steal you for a few minutes Bella?" He eyed me, information coloring his eyes.

" Yeah let's go for a walk." I said quickly

" Bella c'mon let's celebrate." Jake wined.

" I'll be right back don't worry." I kissed him and left.

" I found where she lives." Adam said once we were away from the house.

" Where?"

" In a creepy mansion in the middle of nowhere about 20 miles from here."

She loved extravagant things I guess I'm not surprised she lives in a mansion, what did I expect her to live in a dorm like a normal person?

" Well let's go!" I said in a hurry " If we hurry maybe she won't see us coming."

We sped down the road with Adam driving. I was so nervous, I wonder if since I'm going to marry Jake my future disappears for good. That would be best then she wouldn't be able to see me at all.

We pulled slowly up the gravel drive way and parked close to the house.

" Should I just go knock or walk in?" I said nervously

" look in a window, then knock. Just to be safe." He smiled

He let me go by myself even though I kind of wanted some support up here. All the lights were off when I peered in the window. I rang the door bell and stood there for a good 5 minutes. I touched the door knob experimentally and it was unlocked. I looked at Adam then went in side.

" Hello?" I yelled.

If any vampires were here they would have heard that but then again they could be hiding. I checked all the rooms just to make sure. Nothing. I walked back to the car defeated.

" No one is there." I said as I got back into the car

" Maybe they saw us coming."

" Lets just go back home."

" Jake?" I called when we were back in our apartment.

" I'm in here." He yelled from my room. " I'm just cleaning up a bit."

Good Jake was here which meant that Alice wouldn't be able to see what I was doing.

" Adam come in the bathroom, we need to talk. Quietly."

He looked confused but I didn't care. I had a plan forming in my head.

" Ok so I have a plan."

" Bella. Why can't you just leave this alone she probably knows you saw her."

" Listen. I'm hoping she can't see me at all anymore since I'm with Jake and all. I mean our lives are morphing into one. So anyways. You need to go off with out me and write an e-mail to me in the library telling me that we need to forget about it because she wasn't there so she obviously didn't want to see me. Then I'll go off tomorrow by myself to her house and see if I can surprise her."

" I don't know. This is kinda weird why are you making such a big deal out of this. And what about Jake. Shouldn't he know you're doing this?" Adam said worried like always.

" I'll tell him when the time is right. This is a big deal anyways. Now that I'm going to get married I want to have Alice back in my life."

" Fine."

" Thanks!" I said hugging him

I knew tomorrow would be a big day and I was already stressing about it so I told Jake I was just going to chill and call people tomorrow.

Chapter 15

I woke up at quarter after 9 and got out of bed without jostling the bed so I wouldn't wake Jake but no such luck.

" Bella what are you doing? I thought you didn't have class today."

" I can't sleep anymore. I'm ganna go make breakfast do you want some?"

" No I'm fine I'm ganna sleep a few more hours."

Perfect. Adam would be back in an hour from writing an e-mail to me and then I could go down to Alice's house. Hopefully I could go there and get back without Jake getting wind of anything. I had to find the perfect time to tell him. I know it would be upsetting to him. Who knows what he might do.

I was pacing in the kitchen waiting by the door by the time Adam got home.

" How long have you been waiting here?" He laughed

" Too long. What took you so long!"

" I took as long as I said I would be. Calm down, it's going to be fine."

" OK" I sighed " I guess I'll get going then. If Jake wakes up before I'm back tell him to call me."

On the way over I considered what I should do. I could just pull in front of the house and hope she wouldn't notice until I was in there. I could also park a while away and walk there. Either way I risk her finding out. I figured I would park by the end of the drive way on the street that way she wouldn't really hear the car pull in.

It took a good 20 minutes to walk up to the house. When I was close enough I saw a shadow run across the wall in the front of the mansion that was made out of glass. I sprinted to the door. I wasn't going to let her get away this time.

I knocked not wanting to be completely rude. Nothing.

" Hello?" I said poking my head inside the door. " I know you're here there isn't any reason to hide anymore!"

Not more than a couple seconds had passed and Jasper had appeared in front of me.

" Hello Bella."

I was stunned I guess I assumed Jasper lived with her but he looked at me with the most hostile look I had ever seen.

" Hi." I said looking down. " I want to see Alice."

" You know, it is quite rude to come into somebody's house when they do not let you in." He said tight lipped.

" I'm sorry Jasper. Is Alice here?"

" No and she will not see you any other time so do not bother coming back."

"But-" I began to beg when someone spoke from the other room.

" Let her in Jasper It's fine, really" She sounded sad.

He moved his arm after looking at Alice with questioning eyes and led me into living room. A very lavish, living room that was decorated right out of the 1800's. A very small sad looking Alice sat on a huge couch.

"Alice" I said beginning but I didn't know what to say. I was furious at her for leaving me and not wanting to see me and yet I was so happy to see her I wanted to jump in her arms and never leave her again. By the look on her face she could tell I didn't know what to say.

" Come sit Bella." She smiled slightly.

" What are you doing here Alice?" I blurted out. It sounded more accusing than curious.

" We've been here for a while." She whispered.

" Why? Did you know I was here?" I said growing angrier. Jasper could tell because he came by my side and growled at me. I didn't care that he was once a solider and fought a lot of vampires. I stood up in front of him.

" What is wrong with you Jasper?" I glared

" She was trying to help you."

I have never known Jasper to be very out spoken so It took be by surprise that he was speaking to me this way. I just looked back and forth from Alice and Jasper.

" What aren't you telling me?"" Nothing Bella it's just that I didn't want you to find out we were here." She sighed.

" Is he-" Before I could finish my sentence she answered for me.

" No he isn't I haven't seen him in a while."

" Oh. Sorry" I said looking down. It was a relief for me (kind of) but i'm sure she was sad about it. Edward had always been her favorite.

" It's fine really he is being stubborn."

I had so many questions for her. I didn't know where to start. So I started with the most basic.

" How long have you two been here?"

" A while."

" Alice stop trying to protect me I'm 23 for god sakes!"

" We have been by you ever since we left. I wanted to protect you. It wasn't right to leave you the way we did...again."

She really did look like she was sorry but then I remembered the day they left and the months following it. It was the hardest time in my life. I literally went crazy. My anger flared.

" You knew how much pain I was in and you didn't do a thing?" I yelled.

Jasper was right next to me trying to calm me. Not that I could do any harm to either of them.

" Bella we promised Edward. Even though it was the wrong thing to do we promised and we took care of you the only way we knew how without breaking that promise."

" So why aren't you together then. Does he know you've been watching?"

" No." She said sadly " We went separate ways when he commanded we all leave you alone. He was so angry with me that I thought I could change the future that he left all of us. Emmett and Rose see him occasionally but he refuses to see us."

" What did you see?" I asked curious.

I could tell that she didn't want to tell me but I stared her down until she gave in.

" I saw Edward betraying you and you went off with someone else to spite him and you were miserable but you refused to leave him."

" Well did he think it would make it any better if he just left me! What's wrong with him"

" That's just it Bella I was convinced I could have changed it he said it wouldn't change and we all had to leave."

" Well I did find someone else and I'm very happy without him." I said like a little kid that didn't get him way.

That was the first time Alice looked down and noticed the diamond on my finger.

" Oh Bella! Are you.." She let the question hang

" I'm engaged." I smiled " To Jacob Black!"

Her face scrunched up for a minutes then she laughed " I guess I should have known. I wonder why Amber didn't tell me. And it's also why I can't ever see you."

" Amber? My Amber?" What the hell?

" Oops sorry" She said sheepishly " I sent Amber to be your roommate so I could keep a better eye on you."

" How do you know her? Does she know you're a vampire?"

" yes she know I'm a vampire. She is actually an acquaintance of the Voultri. She was one of their human pets. After they saw how we treated you when you went there they got a few of their own so they could learn a bit about the fascination. I asked them if I could have her to make sure you didn't spill the beans. It was actually quite easy. They agreed not to kill you as long as you were being monitored. She was a lot like me so It worked out well. I thought you would have liked her."

I stared at her horrified " So they would have killed me? Did Edward know about this? and yes she always reminded me of you,"

" No he didn't he didn't think anything through before he left you."

I didn't care about being mad anymore I knew she cared and wanted me to be safe. I ran into her arms and cried.

" Alice I missed you s-so m-much!"

" Me too Bella. I love you."

" I love you too. And I missed you to Jasper!" I jumped up to give him a hug then stepped back when i realized it was probably uncomfortable for him.

" It's fine. I missed you to." He laughed still tight lipped.

My life was getting better when I didn't think it could. I thought to soon when Jacob's Id came up on my phone.

**A/N- I know if you've already read this story before this isnt much different but refresh your memory for the next two parts and review! lol**


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 16

I could feel my face scrunch up with anxiety.

" What's wrong Bella?" She took my phone and smiled.

She did the last thing I ever thought she would do. I watch in slow motion. I tried to stop her but it was to late.

" Hi Jacob! I'm so glad you and Bella are getting married!"

I knew Jacob would recognize her voice and he would be instantly furious. I could almost hear him on the phone, just barely. Alice turned towards me and gave me the phone silently. 'I'm sorry.' I mouthed to her before I took a deep breath and put my ear to the phone.

" Hey Jake."

" Don't play dumb Bella. Why are you there? I know that was Alice Cullen."

" I-I-I didn't know how to tell you."

" Well this isn't a great way to find out you know. I don't want you with them are they all there or what?" He sounded nervous.

" Only Alice and Jasper. No one else knows they're here."

" Good it's going to stay that way. _You_ are coming home and I don't want them around here either. Do you want a repeat of what happened before?"

I couldn't believe he was treating me like his troubled kid. I was his fiancée I wasn't going to be treated like that and he defiantly wasn't going to treat Alice and Jasper badly.

" You can't talk to me like that _Jacob. _Why are you being like this? Your acting like a moron and being really rude. I want them to be in my life!"

This was our first fight in a long time. I guess I knew he might feel like this but I didn't think he would tell me I couldn't see them.

" Just come home we need to talk."

" Fine! But I will see them again. You can't stop me!" I stomped my feet like a 5 year old even though he couldn't see.

I hugged Alice and Jasper again and told them I would see them soon and we would talk more. I couldn't wait to sit and be with them. I wasn't however excited about going to talk to Jake. He was going to make this really difficult on me, I knew it.

I walked cautiously into the apartment and saw Jake sitting in the living room staring at the TV. The TV was _not _on.

" Jake? Are you ok?"

He looked scary. I had never seen him like this before.

" What do you think Bella?" He glared at me

" Why are you treating me like this Jake, we're getting married, we're meant to be together." I said as I climbed into his lap even though I was scared.

" I don't want you to hurt again Bella. If Alice and Jasper are back in your life I just know the rest will come too. I won't allow it!" He said more soft this time.

" It would make me so happy to have them in my life right now. Would you deny me that?" I said innocently

" I'm not like _him _Bella" He spat " I will do what I have to to protect you. I will not let you have what ever you want."

" If that's how you want to act the wedding is off." I said sadly.

I let it hang out there. I didn't want to cancel the wedding, we didn't even tell anyone yet. I knew he would cave eventually and if he didn't did I really want to be with him anyways?

"Bella.. You don't mean that."

" Yes I do Jacob. If you want to control me we are better off apart. I want to be with you though. Won't you reconsider?"

He didn't speak for the longest five minutes in all my life until he finally gave in.

" Fine. But I will be watching them like a hawk and I'm not going to be happy with this."

" Thanks Jake!" I squealed and gave him the most passionate kiss anyone has ever seen.

" Wait before you sidetrack me Bella. Tell me about them. Why are they here? How long?"

" They've been here ever since they left. They knew it wasn't right of Edward but they promised him so they kept their distance. Amber is actually with her. Alice sent her here to look after me."

" Did she think I couldn't do it? What a leech." He mumbled to himself.

" I'm sure she just felt responsible, I know your capable." I smiled

" Wait so who called me that day to come and get you, it wasn't her."

" Hmm I'll have to ask her. And about Tanya."

" Oh by the way Bella. I love you."

" I love you too Jacob Black."

I slept so peacefully that night. Jake woke me up with his snoring so I went into the kitchen for a glass of cold milk. I took me a while to get back to sleep after that but when i did I had the most vivid dreams. They were of Edward. He was in a house by himself. He looked horrible. He mumbled to himself and wrote like a manic on everything. The walls, the floor, paper, doors. I walked up behind him and put my had on his shoulder and he went limp. I thought he died but then i heard him snoring quietly, so peacefully.

I jolted myself awake and instantly felt embarrassed. I was dreaming about Edward my former love right next to the man I was going to marry. I checked the time. 7:45. I showered and left a note for Jake.

_went to see Alice. Don't worry I'll be fine. I love you and I'll be back soon. I'll call you later_

_3 Bella_

" Bella!"

Alice ran into me and hugged me tight. I think she was trying to be gentle but it just didn't work out that way. Hopefully Jake wouldn't see the bruises that would show up later.

" Hi" I laughed " How did you know I was here?"

" Who else would be coming here at 8 in the morning? C'mon I'll cook you breakfast. Jasper is hunting so i'm here alone." She pouted so the briefest of seconds.

" Jasper is hunting by himself?" They were almost always together or not far from each other so it confused me.

" Yeah he had a lot on his mind." She said simply and strutted in the kitchen.

The kitchen was stocked very well for never having any humans here. It was beautiful, it looked like it had all original hardware from over a hundred years ago. She started cooking eggs and bacon and toast when I stopped her. I don't think she knows how much a human eats. I mentally laughed. It was so great having her back.

I scarfed down the food she made so fast. I hadn't even realized how hungry I was until now. Alice had her head resting on her hand looking at me with her big innocent eyes.

" So Alice tell me more." I laughed. I couldn't help it around her i felt so bubbly.

" Like what?"

" Who called the day you left? Jake said someone called him to tell him I was in trouble."

" That was Amber. She had been with me for a couple of days already. I knew the future had to go one of two ways so I prepared myself. After that I had Amber go home and tell her family she was going to college and she got a hold of Jacob to get the room mate position. Jasper and I were on a plane to go with Carlisle and Esme but I couldn't leave."

" They didn't want to come with you?"

" They didn't agree. They thought we should let you heal and they wanted to honor Edward's wishes. Jasper and I haven't talked to anyone in a while."

" Well what about Tanya coming to see me in the hospital then?" I said changing the subject, I knew Alice was upset she couldn't see her family.

She looked utterly confused.

" What? Tanya came to see you? When?" She shook my shoulders surprising me. I thought she was the one to send her.

" When they took me to the hospital so I wouldn't hurt myself everyone left the room and Tanya came in. She said that she couldn't stay and she was sorry this is the way it had to be but she wanted to tell me ' The Cullen's' were happy now. I thought you would have sent her or something."

" No..." her mouth stayed in a little 'O' while she was thinking.

" Alice?"

" It must have been Edward." She looked up at me. " I guessed he would have gone to the Denali clan but why would he send Tanya."

She was deep in thought and shaking her head like she was trying to push images out of her mind. I didn't think it was such a big deal but I must have been missing something. Jasper sped in the room at that moment and interrupted my thoughts. He must have sensed the emotions because he tensed up.

Chapter 17

" Alice? What are you thinking about?"

He looked at me when he said it, like I could give him the answers but I just shrugged my shoulders not knowing what the big deal was.

" The vision must have come true anyways. If this is true he is an imbecile!" She spat, so un-Alice like.

" Huh?"

" He's got to be with Tanya. I gatta call Rose."

" Umm I'd rather not be here. I'll just see you guys later. Call me when you are free again?" Alice just nodded already dialing.

On the drive home I thought about what Alice was saying. Edward cheated on me with Tanya in her vision i'm guessing. How could he? Was he happy now that he was with Tanya. For the briefest second I was furious and jealousy consumed me. The next second I recovered. I was with Jake now and I loved Edward a little to hope that he was at least happy now, he showed me how wonderful life could be and I could never wish any bad on him even when he left me.

I was 5 minutes from home when i realized I was graduating today! I was so wrapped up in Alice and Jasper being here I totally forgot what day it was. I had 3 hours till graduation. I sped home to get ready.

" Bella where were you?" Amber said whizzing by me. " We have to get ready!"

" Didn't you see my note?" I raised my eyebrow. I was testing to see if she would deny knowing Alice.

" Oh yeah." She blushed. " How are Alice and Jasper by the way I haven't seen them in ages." She said more casually.

" They're fine. It was quite a shock to know you were connected with her and the Voultri." I smiled " Very badass."

We both laughed. " Now that you're over the shock let's get ready. Jake and Adam went to get some coffee."

" Oh and you know Adam is a vampire too i'm guessing?"

" Oh totally. it's obvious. Oh and I called Alice and Jasper to invite them to the ceremony, they'll be there don't worry."

Amber was so great. I totally forgot to invite them. It would be weird for Alice and Jasper to be around my family again. I wonder what Charlie will say.

All four us of looked great. Amber wore her hair in a curled side pony and her red robe went great with her red eye shadow. Adam and Jake did nothing new and both looked very handsome in their black robes. I wore my hair curled and parted to the side with a red ruby hair clip that I found in my room with a note from Alice - 'Enjoy!' it said. She couldn't resist shopping for something new.

The ceremony was great but long. The graduating classes were separated in the majors of everyone. Adam and I in the Vet program, Jake in the nature conservists program, and Amber in cosmotology.

Everyone threw their caps up and cheered, I however was winding my way over to Jake to kiss him and congratulate him. Jake and I walked over to find my Mom and Phil, Charlie and - surprise surprise- his date Sue Clearwater, and Billy.

I hadn't seen Charlie since I came home to see him when school started 4 years ago. It actually brought me to tears. I let got of Jake and ran into his arms like I was a little girl again.

" Congratulations Bells. I'm so proud of you!" He was trying to hide the tears he let escape too.

" Mom, Phil, Sue I'm glad you came" I said hugging them both.

Then I engulfed Billy in a hug because he was going to be my father in law soon, Jake had also already told him. He was so excited all he kept saying was we were going to have strong wolf babies in the family. I cringed, I didn't want to have babies for a while.

I saw Alice and Jasper out of the corner of my eye walking slowly towards us. I smiled widely, my family was complete.

I hugged them both and turned back to my family to see them in shock.

" Well if it isn't Alice and Jasper Cullen." Charlie said, I couldn't tell if he was happy or angry.

" Hi Charlie" Alice smiled and hugged him " I'm so sorry we haven't seen you in so long. I've really missed you."

" I've missed you to Alice." He smiled, she must have dazzled him.

"Why don't we all go back to our apartment. I have some news and I think that Adam is cooking dinner for us. Amber will be there with her parents too."

Without even talking to Alice I could tell she was hiding something from me. Plus to make matters worse anger was rolling off of Jake. He made a point to wave his hands over his nose and say 'what smells' at least 5 times. He could be so immature sometimes.

It was so crowded in our apartment with everyone there. Alice and Jasper said they had to run an errand and they would be back in an hour or two, which was their excuse to not be there for dinner. Adam however surprised me and ate! He didn't even look disgusted or anything. Edward had told me enough that I knew later he would barf it up. I thought it was a nice gesture though to eat with our families.

Alice and Jasper arrived right before I had everyone sit down so Jake and I could tell them were were engaged.

" So everyone I know you probably know by now that Jake and I have been dating for a while now." Jake stood up and wrapped his arm around me feeling my nerves. " Well.. We have decided to take the next step and get married!"

I held out my hand for everyone to see. Just as I thought everyone was over joyed. Charlie said he always knew that we were destined and Renee even cried. Alice of course started talking about planning the wedding.

The night came and went and soon it was time for everyone to leave. I told them I would see them in a month or two to come to Forks to start planning the wedding.

I was going to go straight to bed and clean up in the morning even though Adam would probably do it for me but Alice stopped me.

" Bella would you like to come over to our house for a little while?" Her comment was thick with double meaning.

" Alice." I whined " I'm so tired I'll come over tomorrow around 10?"

" Fine. But it would have been better if you came tonight." She said curtly and walked out the door.

I was warm and comfortable in Jake's room- we always had an air conditioner on for me so i wouldn't over heat next to Jake all night- when he sat up and wrapped his arms around me.

" Bella are you awake?" he whispered. I almost pretended to be asleep so he would leave me alone but it must be important.

" Yeah" I whispered sitting up.

" I've been keeping something from you." I waited " It's great we're ganna have the wedding in Forks and everything but I don't want you going there in a month to start planning."

When he didn't say anything for a few seconds I intervened.

" Why?"

" Because the pack has been tracking Victoria."

" What? How long has she been there?"

" About a month. Don't worry though the pack is watching Charlie and she hasn't made a move yet. They aren't sure what she wants. She probably doesn't even know you're gone."

" I'm going back regardless. If the pack is doing as good job as you say it isn't necessary to be worried and besides I want to be with Charlie if she's nearby."

" Then I'm going too."

" I excepted that much anyways." I smiled and kissed him goodnight.

Chapter 18

I ended up at Alice's house at 10:01, I knew how impatient she gets especially since she can't see me. Alice answered the door and smiled widely.

"Hi Bella." She said hugging me.

" What is so important Alice?" I was tired of her beating around the bush.

" Well I'm not sure how you're going to react since I can't see you but I have a surprise."

I figured it was something I wasn't going to like since she had to look into the future to see. I Heard a baseball game in the background and immediately thought of Emmett. No one else in the family watched sports.

" Alice. You didn't" I grumbled

" They insisted on coming when I told them where I was and that we were with you."

I somehow doubted that. Rosalie didn't have a new reason to like me so I was guessing the situation was the same. I walked in cautiously and saw Emmett and Rosalie sitting on the couch. They both looked up when I came in. Rosalie just looked at me. It was a start since she didn't scowl at me. Emmett bound up to me and wrapped me in a bear hug.

" Bella! You look the same!" He laughed " I'm sure as clumsy as ever also" he smiled his big dimple smile and nudged Rosalie on the arm.

" Hello Bella." She nodded her head towards me. I wasn't going to push for more that was as friendly as Rosalie would probably ever get with me.

What was I going to do? Jake would find out eventually that Rosalie and Emmett were here visiting and I promised him no other vampires would be here. I immediately thought about how he wouldn't trust me anymore. I was happy to see Emmett though even though he was always teasing me he was fun and always nice so I couldn't complain.

Alice and Jasper sat down next to Rosalie and Emmett so I sat down too. I could tell Alice wanted to talk.

" So what's up Alice?" I said

She smiled grateful someone asked I'm sure. " Well I called Rose and Em in the first place to ask about Edward and why he would be with _Tanya - _don't get me wrong I like her and everything, they're practically family, but why would Edward ever want to be with her. It was sketchy to me."

Emmett cut in to add to the story " Yeah, he went to the Denali clan after we all left. He didn't want to see anyone so we went separate ways. Tanya convinced him to stay with her. He must have been pretty messed up to just stay with her like that." I thought of them together, it made me want to throw up. Edward, once my gentlemanly Edward with sensuous, sexy Tanya. " He left her after about a year though he was totally disgusted with himself, he pretty much vowed he would never be with anyone again. Pretty harsh if you ask me."

" Not really I mean he left the love of his life so he wouldn't ruin her life and then he tries to be with someone to make up for the lost love and he hates himself for it. I would feel the same way." Alice said

" Soo what are you saying?" I didn't really get the point of them telling me this.

" He has been absolutely miserable the past few years. He has gone crazy if a vampire can do so." Rosalie started but Alice cautioned her. " When Alice told us she was with you we came to ask you a favor." They all stared at me.

" Yes?"

" We wanted to see if maybe you would talk some sense into him. Tell him your fine. Maybe tell him to move on and stay with his family. He doesn't live far from here."

I recalled my dream. Edward was going crazy writing on everything and he looked dead figuratively of course since he was already dead. It must have been a sign. I guess I could go and tell him to move on and that I forgive him. On the other hand though a trip to see him to could damage me. Jake would never forgive me if he found out. I was getting tired of lying to him but I didn't want to hurt him.

" I guess I could." I answered them flatly.

" Thank you so much Bella" Rosalie said.

" You and I can go later today if you want Bella." Alice said cheerfully.

" If you don't mind I would rather go by myself."

" Sure but we'll go into town with you so we're close in case you need anything." They all smiled.

Edward lived by himself in a house about two hours away in a small town called Camdon. I was so nervous. One because I hadn't seen Edward since he left me and I didn't know what his reaction would be and two because I didn't want Jake to call or find out. If he called I didn't want to lie to him, Alice did promise me she would talk to him as long as I forwarded the call to her.

I took a separate car from Emmett, Alice, Jasper and Rosalie but we all met up at a diner in town to make a game plan. They told me to be myself and act normal. I figured I would just say that I was with Alice and she heard where he was and I wanted to come see how he was. I didn't think he would be fooled by my selflessness but it was worth a try.

I parked outside his house and waited hesitantly. I was having second thoughts about doing this. I did owe it to the Cullen's to at least make sure their brother was ok, even though I wasn't responsible.

I knocked on the door surprised that he didn't answer it before. Maybe he forgot my scent. I watched the door open in slow motion.

Edwards beautiful god-like face hit me like a ton of rocks. His stone carved lips turned up slowly at the sides turning into his dazzling crooked smile that I could never forget.

" Bella." He sighed.

He looked horrible. He looked pale, pale for a vampire anyways and he had huge purple bags under his eyes. His eyes were as dark as I had ever seen them. He would have looked scary if he wasn't smiling at me tenderly.

" Hi Edward." I breathed distracted by his very presence. It almost didn't seem real like he was an imaginary person I dreamt up that I was seeing in the flesh for the first time. We stared at each other for the longest time it seemed before I had the guts to say anything.

" How are you?"

He shook his head as if he was coming out of a trance " How rude of me. Would you like to come in Bella?"

" Yeah sure." He led me down the long hall to his living room.

" I'm well." He said with guarded eyes.

" Edward...I hope you won't be to angry but Alice has been with me." I said as we both took a seat on opposite facing chairs.

He looked away from me to try and hide his expression but I caught it before he could compose himself. I couldn't quite tell what it was but I thought that it was jealousy and then relief.

" Well at least someone has been keeping you out of harms way, I'm surprised your still alive." He said darkly.

I felt anger rise in me the littlest bit " Actually Jake has been taking care of me, up until a few weeks ago I hadn't known Alice was watching over me."

" Jacob Black?" He cringed. It was his own fault his competition swooped in and took me as his fiancé.

" Yes." I saw his glance down at my left hand. I immediately regretted telling him. I was being selfish, he was in pain. He put his head in his hands and quietly sobbed.

" I guess I knew it would happen sooner or later and who better than my only other competition."

" Edward-" He raised his hand to tell me not to bother.

" Don't apologize for getting on with your life Bella. It is what I wanted for you after all."

" Well see that's why I came here, Alice had told me she heard you were here and that you weren't doing so hot. I wanted to come and talk to you. To tell you I'm fine and maybe get back with your family. They miss you so much Edward, Alice is really torn by your fight."

" I left for a reason and they disobeyed my wishes. You were supposed to be undisturbed, no more vampires in your life."

Sometimes I just didn't understand him. Not everything was about him and no matter how much he was hurting right now I was going to tell him how I felt. I can't help it I have such a temper.

" First off Edward I met a vampire the first week I went off to school and he has been very good to me, we're best friends. Secondly your not a dictator your family can do what they want. Did you know the Voultri were going to kill me since I was on my own? Alice convinced them not to when she had one of their human pets live with me to spy on me!"

His face fell. " Bella I didn't know." He said with great sadness.

" I'm not finished yet." I glared " You can be so selfish sometimes. You left me. After you said you would never leave me again. Do you know what I went through. I was in a mental hospital!"

I contemplated going easy on him since all this was news to him and every word that came out of my mouth seemed to be another slap to his face.

" Why did you go with Tanya?" I said flatly I was genuinely curious.

" Because...I was with the Denali clan anyways and she wanted to be with me, I went with her because it was going to happen anyways why tempt fate. I left her after a year anyways, I was disgusted with myself for falling victim to a stupid vision."

" Did you really not care for me that much that you went straight to Tanya when you left me?" I said sadly

" I loved you as much as I was capable of loving- no I still love you. My love for you has consumed my life and I have regretted leaving you all these years. But the vision Alice had it couldn't have changed, something that we would have done would have led us there anyways."

" No Edward she only had that vision because Tanya or you were having the thoughts or doubts. Alice knew she could change it, why didn't you believe? Our lives depended on it. You were only thinking of yourself contrary to what you would have everyone believe. Nothing would have happened if you just stayed with me like you said you would! But now we're apart, your miserable, and I'm getting married to someone else!"

I slapped his face in my fit of rage. I knew it wouldn't hurt him but it had the desired effect when I saw his shocked face. I sobbed letting all my anger out that I stored away years ago when I wanted to forget.

Edward grabbed my hands and pinned them to his chest. Before I could struggle or protest he kissed me so passionately. His hands slowly let go of mine and our arms intertwined with each other. My lips burned and my whole body seemed to set on fire. It was as if our bodies were melting into one and we were the only two people on earth. Time stopped. All we had was time, time to be with each other. My mind was blank and all I could think about was his lips on mine and the urgent way he held onto my body.

When we parted I stared into his beautiful eyes, not caring that they were pitch black and not my favorite butterscotch color, and watched them scrunch up with his crooked smile. We both sighed.

I suddenly spun back into reality, I was ENGAGED! What on earth was I doing? Jake was waiting at home for me. I ran out of there as fast as I could. I could hear Edward sputter behind me confused as to what to do. I ran right past my car and onto the street. I dialed Alice's number but couldn't speak.

Chapter 19

" Bella?" " Bella? Are you okay?" " Bella! Why aren't you talking? We're driving over there now!" I heard the worry and urgency in her voice and I knew they would find me running on their way here.

I ran for about three miles when Alice's porche drove past me then screeched to a stop and backed up just as fast.

I had been crying and I fell a few times so I knew I probably looked bad but I didn't expect all three of them to stare at me with shocked eyes.

" What happened Bella I couldn't see. You really scared us when you weren't answering."

I was physically exhausted and my legs gave out. The weight of what just happened pull down on me. I don't think I could have talked even if I wanted to. The fact was that I enjoyed it. I loved the feeling of being with Edward again, but I loved Jake more than anything and I wouldn't hurt him. Jake was there for me when Edward wasn't, he never left me for my own good. He stayed through it all.

"Em help her in the car." Rosalie said gently.

" C'mon Bella we'll get you some place safe, you don't have to worry."

They must think Edward did something to me, I guess I would pull the same conclusion if I were them. Why else would I leave in such a hurry and forget my car, which would be faster than running.

Edward POV

I was so happy to see Bella- My Bella- that after she ranted about how horrible I was I kissed her. I believe it was the most passionate kiss in history. Both our walls came down and we were us again. I no longer wanted to die, I wanted to live. I wanted to win Bella back. I promised the mutt I would always fight for her and now I was going to fulfill that promise.

I stared into those perfect chocolate brown eyes and wanted her back more than anything. She smiled at me and it was as if she felt the same as me.

All too fast her radiant smile turned into a frown and she spun around and ran away. I was too stunned to run after her for almost a half hour. I followed her scent to catch her and tell her how much I wanted her back. She would take me back eventually.

I watched as she fell to the ground outside of a porche stuffed with Alice, Jasper, Emmett, and Rosalie. I watched from the trees. I stared at them in horror as I read their thoughts.

OMG Bella! I knew I should have gone with her. What happened! Jacob is going to kill me if he finds out something bad happened to her!

I wonder what happened I can't get a grip on what her emotions mean. Fear? Grief? Exhaustion?

Wow I've never seen Bella like this before. Yeah right, this use to happen all the time! Probably an over reaction but we better get her out of here in case Edward shows up and sees us here.

Oh man what happened? I thought this was just going to be a quick trip. She looks so fragile. Edward better not have let his anger get the best of him, Bella will always be my little sister no matter who she's married to!

So what they all think I tried to hurt her? What is wrong with them I could never hurt her no matter what happened between us! I'm going to watch over her for now on, I don't care that she has everyone else as far as I'm concerned no one will do a better job than me.

We made a two hour trip home into a half hour ride. I still couldn't talk when we got home. Emmett carried me into Alice's house and put me up in her room. I slept until the morning.

I woke up to dawn. I slept the rest of the day and though the night it seemed. All my joints and muscles hurt. I don't think I ever ran that much at a time. Adrenaline can do a lot for the body I guess.

I slumped out of bed and went downstairs to find everyone, and get food I was starving.

" Hey Bella. How are you feeling?" Alice said as she was tidying up.

" uhm" I cleared my throat " I'm okay." I said shyly I don't know what conclusion they drew from yesterday but I almost wanted to let them think it. It would be so humiliating telling them what happened. I also saw Jasper nod his head to Alice as if confirming what I was saying to her. I was 23 now I could take care of myself.

"Jacob has been calling relentlessly Bella." Alice said eyeing me.

" What did you say?" My voice going up an octave with stress.

" I said we had a sleep over and you were still sleeping. Yesterday I ignored his calls so he's pretty suspicious. You haven't really been spending a lot of time with him you know."

" I better call him."

Jake picked up on the first ring as if he was looking at the phone waiting for it to ring.

" Hey Jake. Did you call me?"

" Uh Duh! What have you been doing Hun?"

" Yesterday Alice took me shopping. Spur of the moment thing, you know how Alice is. I left my phone at her house on accident and then when I got home I ate a little something and fell asleep right at the table! I just woke up actually."

" Really." Jake said flatly. " I went to Alice's house yesterday and guess who I saw there Bella?"

" Who?" I said meekly

" They big one and his blonde mate."

" Emmett and Rosalie?"

" Yeah. Cut the crap and tell me what is going on. We're all worried about you, you've hardly spent any time at home. Adam said you guys had plans and you ditched him, We just got engaged and I haven't been able to celebrate with you yet."

" Jake..."

" yes?"

" You have to understand, I didn't know Emmett and Rosalie were going to be here. They came to ask me for a favor..." I didn't know if I could tell him about Edward.

" What kind of favor?" I could tell he was angry I could practically hear him grinding his teeth.

" Well it's just that E-Edward has been away from his family and he's been really miserable by himself and they asked me to tell him I was ok and to go home and move on." I said really fast and cringed waiting for what would happen next.

"WHAT! YOU WENT TO SEE HIM?" I heard crashing in the background

" Jake please calm down you're scaring me." I've never actually seen him get this angry and it really did scare me. I just thanked my lucky stars that I wasn't at home because Jake could lose control being this angry.

" You promised Bella! When you said yes to marry me you made a promise to me that he was in your past. Is he still in your past?"

" Yeah Jake." I thought of ways I could calm him down but since I wasn't there, there wasn't much I could do. I guess I was to late though since the phone went dead. It was better than he hung up on me then saying something we both would regret.

Before I could get myself worked up I instantly felt relaxed. I looked at Jasper with a thankful look. I ran to the couch and curled up at the other end of Emmett. He patted my feet and smiled.

" Alice is making breakfast for you."

" Thanks guys for always taking care of me I really appreciate it."

" You're family it's what we do." Emmett smiled.

Alice made me French toast, bacon, and sausage. When I was finished they all sat around me and settled in to hear a story.

" What happened Bella?" Alice's eyes were so sad I wanted to cheer her up.

" He didn't physically hurt me if that's what you're asking." I said flatly.

They all looked extremely relieved, Alice's shoulder's actually relaxed like she was tensed since yesterday waiting for answers.

" Why the mad dash then?" Emmett looked confused

" Yes I couldn't get a hold of your emotions there were so many at the same time."

" I yelled at him and told him how horrible he was-"

" That's not what you were suppose to do, you made it worse!" Rosalie assumed.

" I didn't finish" I glared at her, she couldn't walk all over me anymore " He didn't care he kissed me, well I kissed back. It was wrong, I was feeling the wrong things so I ran and I fell a lot. I'm surprised he didn't follow us back here."

" Actually Bella.. He might have been here. You smelled so much like him yesterday that I assumed it was you. But the scent was stronger I guess I was just to distracted to put it all together. He was...in my room."

" What? He was with me? Why didn't any one check on me or something?" I didn't need a fight between Edward and Jake right now.

" Oh no."

" What's wrong Alice" Jasper said at her side.

" Everything just disappeared."

Chapter 20

Oh god what was Jake doing here? This isn't going to be good. We all sat there waiting for him to tear down the door or something but he just knocked, a little hard maybe but nothing to knock the door down.

" Hello Jacob." Alice decided to answer the door.

" Let me see Bella."

" Not until you're in control, you're shaking. Think of Bella, you could seriously hurt her Jacob."

" I'm fine. I'm coming to take her home."

I walked right past him out the door and to my car, it looks like he ran here, very stupid. Someone could have seen him. I heard him spin around and glare at me.

" You smell like him. What did you do?"

" Nothing Jake, really." I was backing away i knew he wasn't himself right now.

" The scent never lies!" He gritted his teeth

" Jake you need to calm down" I said still backing away.

I turned to see Alice flanked by Emmett and Jasper run out of the house. Alice nodded to Jasper, probably to calm Jake down but it didn't look like it was working. I looked at them desperately for them to intervene. I didn't want to be in the same car with Jake when he was this angry.

" Don't tell me to calm down Bella. You promised no more vampires! Alice and Jasper is enough, then the other two come back AND you go see Edward. What's wrong with you!"

" J-Jake your not yourself calm down." I eyed his body starting to shake violently.

" Jacob you need to calm down your not in control. You could hurt her." Alice said calmly.

" Don't tell me what to do!"

Jake grabbed my arm and marched me over to the car. Emmett flinched getting ready to help if it got dangerous.

" Jake.. Your hurting me." I tried to sound calm so I wouldn't upset him more. When he didn't answer I screamed his name, it felt like he was squeezing harder. Jake, Alice, Jasper, and Emmett were staring each other down.

I blinked and when I opened my eyes Edward was standing in front of Jake.

" Let her go. You're hurting her." He said fiercely.

I took one step forward and started to tell him to stop but he looked over and glared at me which made me stop in my tracks. Edward wasn't usually scary but when he was angry like this he was REALLY scary.

I saw Rosalie run out of the house smiling.

" No Rose." Emmett said before she could run at Edward.

" Jake please!" I whimpered.

" You're feud is with me let Bella go." He said flatly again.

Jake looked from his arm down to mine and then looked at me and let go. He was really upset with himself but he was still shaking. I took the risk and put my hand on his arm.

" Jake? It's fine." I smiled

He looked away from me and back to Edward.

" Bella go home. I don't want you in anymore danger today." Edward glared at Jake.

" I would never hurt her you bloodsucker!" Jake said pointing a finger at Edward

" You're dangerously close to hurting her right now but you don't seem to care."

That did it Jake shook and turned into a wolf.

" Jake don't!" I screamed he might like it now but a while from now he would be upset if he killed Edward. Or not.

" It seems that Bella wants me safe mongrel." He smiled slyly. I have never seen Edward act like this and it repulsed me.

" What's wrong with you?" I spat at him

" Just putting my promise back into motion." He said slyly

" What promise?"

" I said I would always fight for you , I've seen the light and decided to stick to my promise." He was being so casual and I knew it was to upset Jake.

" You better leave now, before Jake rips your head off."

I watched him laugh and turn back towards Jake. Jake let out a low growl.

" Listen and listen good Jacob Black. I love Bella and I will be fighting for her until the day I die."

Jake let a loud growl rip and I had to put my hands over my ears it was so loud. My eyes widened in shock as Jake crouched down to pounce.

" NO JAKE DON'T!"

By the time I could run over to him he was already on top of Edward. His front paws on his chest and growls were ripping from his chest again.

Alice and Rosalie whimpered afraid for their brother while Jasper and Emmett just stood there with blank expressions. I guess Jasper would have been able to tell if Edward was in any danger but it was still scary.

Edward hit him in his shoulder and Jake flew off.

" STOP!" I screamed " Jasper do something!" I screamed desperately they were going to kill each other if they didn't stop.

They were circling around each other, both waiting for a chance to make a move. Edward launched at Jake and threw another punch at his face.

" Oh my god they are going to kill each other." My voice trembled

" Edward wouldn't do that I think he is just giving him the fight he wants" Jasper said calmly not moving his eyes away from the fight.

Jake launched at Edward and bit his arm but Edward was too fast and threw him off him.

" That's enough! Jake stop NOW!" I screamed as loud as I could.

They both stopped and looked at me, my face looking like hell with tears and make up running down my face.

I walked slowly over and put my hand on Jake.

" Jake c'mon let's go home don't even bother with him" I glared at Edward " He isn't worth it"

I watched Jake slowly shrink back down to a human. I ran and jumped in his arms crying.

"Don't EVER do that again! You scared the shit out of me." I smiled through tears.

" Sorry." He said in my hair. "Let's go."

All was forgiven with Jake but Edward was another story. I didn't look back behind me I just got in the car with Jake in tow and sped down the path to the street.

Chapter 21

Edward POV

I followed Alice's Porsche to her mansion to watch over Bella. To my surprise they left her alone in Alice and Jasper's room. Bella fell asleep almost right after her head hit the pillow that Emmett laid her on.

She was so delicate, always more delicate after something disturbing happened to her. Her scent burned my throat, it was like the first time I smelt her but entirely different. I let the pain completely overpower me as I laid next to her only to torture myself more than I have in the past 5 years I willed myself to stay away from her.

Her chocolate brown hair laid out around her head like a halo. Yes, she was definitely an angel. I buried my head in her hair and breathed in deeply so all I could smell was her.

She was so much more skinny than I remember and her eyes seemed permanently sunken in but she was still the most beautiful thing on earth. What could ever have possessed me to ever leave her I didn't know, when I was with her I forgot my past and my life had reason.

I brushed my fingers up and down her pale face leaving goose bumps where ever I touched. I froze when she shivered. I grabbed two fleece blankets from the closet and wrapped her up in them so she wouldn't be bothered by our close proximity anymore.

I laid with her until dawn when she began to stir. She would be waking up anytime now and I didn't want her to find me there, just yet. She said my name 5 times the whole time she was sleeping but i came in second with Jacob's name being said 7. I had a plan laid out that would change all of that.

I looked at her one last time longing for her to be mine again before jumping out her window and running into the woods to watch her from a far.

Hours passed and all she did was lounge on the couch with Emmett. Thankfully Alice remembered to feed her. I tensed up when Alice sat down and asked Bella what had happened. I know I acted like an animal by leaving Bella and being with Tanya but did they really think that I would ever hurt her. I smiled when I heard her say she was feeling the wrong things. I knew that kiss meant as much as it did to her as it did me.

I was happily surprised to hear that Jacob was on his way, his thoughts were animalistic, he was not in control. I watched carefully as they went outside and he grabbed her arm. Why would anyone ever want to hurt such an angel. Without even thinking I ran to stop him.

Everyone was so shocked to see me, but it didn't give me any gratification to know my families loving thoughts.

" Let her go. You're hurting her."

Bella started to walk towards me, she wasn't going to stop what Jacob had coming to him. I glared at her so she wouldn't walk another step.

" You're feud is with me let Bella go."

The mutt let go but Bella stayed by him and tried to comfort him. That was so Bella, always putting herself in danger for the people she loved most, never knowing the true danger.

" Go home Bella I don't want you in anymore danger today" I said looking at Jacob

I was really enjoying the anger that was rolling off of Jacob from my very presence. I put my plan in motion by telling him how Bella wanted me safe. He didn't like that too much. I laughed darkly to myself.

" What's wrong with you?" Bella spat at me

" Just putting my promise back into motion."

" What promise?"

" I said I would always fight for you , I've seen the light and decided to stick to my promise." I knew this would upset Jacob but I also wanted Bella to really know how I felt.

" You better leave now, before Jake rips your head off."

I laughed and turned back towards Jacob as he let out a growl and pounced at me.

" Listen and listen good Jacob Black. I love Bella and I will be fighting for her until the day I die."

It sent him over the edge but I threw a punch at his shoulder to get him off me. He came back trying to rip off my arm but I was too fast. We both stopped when we heard Bella scream at the top of her lungs for us to stop.

We both watched Jacob slowly turn back into a human, Bella ran at full speed and jumped into his arms. I didn't want to see it, her wrapped around Jacob's naked body. She was grabbing onto his bare skin as if she was holding onto life itself. She use to hold me like that when she was scared. That could have been me if I never left her. I felt my soul drop out of my body, despair weighing down on me as I watched them, totally in love and glad each other was okay. It burned my very core to see Bella, my Bella, so passionate with someone else, especially a werewolf.

I stood and watched her leave with him down the drive way to the main road. Neither me nor my family moved for a whole minute after she left. I turned slowly to look at them. I could tell they were about to bombard me with questions, love, and welcome backs. I didn't give them the chance to, I ran away from there as fast I could knowing none of them could catch up to me if I just kept running. I had to have time to myself before could see them again. The sight of Bella and Jacob was to much for me right now.

_Come back when you're ready we'll be here. I miss you. I love you.._

Alice's thoughts towards me were the last I heard before I was out of hearing distance.

Jake and I drove in silence on the way home. We also didn't let go of each other, our hands were glued together. The only time our hands weren't together was when Jake put his pants and shirt back on.

I think it really calmed him down to know that I was fighting for him and not Edward. Truth be told though I didn't want to hurt Edward's feelings but the way he handled things was over the line and I didn't really have a choice. I was going home in two weeks to start planning my wedding and I didn't need a situation where the wedding would be in jeopardy of happening.

When we pulled into the parking lot outside our apartment we both sat there before looking at each other and taking deep breaths.

" Bella. I'm really ashamed of how I acted, I shouldn't have let my anger take me over like that. I really could have hurt you." He said looking down at his lap.

" Jake it's fine, I forgive you. I don't even know why Edward was there he must have been watching. And it was definitely not his place to act the way he did."

I heard Jake mumble something under his breath that sounded like profanities but I ignored it.

" Let's go inside, I'm sure everyone is worried. I haven't been home very much ."

"Let's, but wait." he smiled and ran to my side of the car. " C'mon little monster" I giggled as he picked me up out of the car and carried me up to the apartment.

" Bella!" Amber said running up to us as we came in, Adam followed her.

" hey guys! I missed you." I said hugging them both. " Adam I'm really sorry I ditched you, I was a little preoccupied and it wasn't fair to you."

" It's fine, I'm sure you'll make it up to me. Plus I would like to meet the famous Alice and Jasper" He looked at Jacob and added " Sometime."

" Of course I'm sure you've heard so much about them from other people, including big mouth Amber." I laughed now that she was out about knowing about Alice and Jasper and vampires and everything that's all she could talk about. I gatta give her credit she had a darker past then any of us expected from an upper east side girl.

" I'm going to steal Bella for the rest of the night so go out or something." He said rolling his eyes.

We spent the rest of the night talking about everything. We talked about how excited we both were about getting married and being together forever. He promised me that when Victoria was taken care of he would stop phasing all the time and settle down with me. We talked about Alice and Jasper and what we did together, we never mentioned Edward. We stopped talking for a while and cuddled. The cuddling led to much better things though. After a few hours of having much needed fun time with Jake we talked even more. We talked until the wee hours of the night and fell asleep in each others arms.

Two weeks came and went and it was time to go home to plan my wedding. Jake had been crazed the past week making sure everything was safe for me to go home. I told him if it was safe or not I was going up there but he just rolled his eyes like I was kidding or something.

I saw Alice a few times in the past couple weeks and it was decided that she was to come home with us. I think the only reason Jake thought it was okay was because he could always use more surveillance for me and for Victoria.

I saw Rosalie and Emmett before they left to go home to Carlisle and Esme a few day ago also. Emmett gave me their address and phone numbers so I could call and visit if I wanted to. Rosalie even seemed to warm up to me since she saw that Edward was alright. Alice assured her he would come home soon and visit with them.

I was really looking forward to Amber coming with us to help plan the wedding but she needed to do more important things. Since she had been keeping contact with the Voultri they knew that I knew who she was and The Cullen's were back in my life. Alice has " foreseen a vision" that I would become a vampire again so they also agreed to let me live as long as the deed was completed. They insisted that Amber be sent back to Voulterra to be with them.

I silently prayed that they wouldn't kill her. She confidently told me she would either stay a pet of theirs or she would be turned. I shivered at the thought of her as one of them. My Amber was way to nice to ever be like them. Whatever the case we , tearfully, said our goodbyes and our hope to see you again some days.

Jake, Me, Adam, Alice, and Jasper were all leaving for Forks later tonight so while Jake was getting ready and making endless phone calls to the pack members I took Adam to meet Alice and Jasper.

" You're going to love them" I said parking in front of their house.

" Yeah from what I've heard they're great."

" Hey guys!" Alice said running up to us from the kitchen. " You must be Adam, I heard how you stayed with Carlisle and Esme."

" Yeah they made me who I am today, without them I would be a savage." He smiled proudly

" yeah that's how Jasper and I would have been if we hadn't had them in our lives either. I don't know how or who made me but I had my visions to guide me to them and Jasper was with another coven in the south when I met him. He was in the middle of a war and killed endless people and vampires Carlisle and Esme showed us how life could be better and filled with love."

Adam and Alice were involved in such deep conversation I went to find Jasper and see what he was doing. "Jasper?" I said in a normal voice knowing he would hear me.

" Up here Bella." He called from the guest bedroom.

He was setting up shelves and piling books on them. There was already a comfy gold couch in the corner. " What are you doing?" I said looking around the room. He stopped doing what he was doing and turned towards me to talk.

" I'm setting up the room for someone to move in" He said carefully.

" Who?" I said not getting what he was talking about. I thought maybe Rosalie and Emmett or maybe one of the Denali's.

" Edward. He came back finally a few days ago and asked if he could stay with us. He's our brother we couldn't deny him a place to stay, especially since we haven't seen him in so long."

" Oh yes you shouldn't deny him on my account anyways. Just make sure he stays away from me please. I wouldn't be able to come over here anymore without a fight if Jake knew Edward was staying here."

" Of course." He went to continue setting things up. " He's in town buying things for his room, since you're wondering anyways." He laughed

" Why didn't Alice tell me?"

" She left it up to me actually. She was scared you wouldn't want to come and see her anymore. She's always worrying about you since she can't see your future anymore. I'm sure Amber was tired of the calls all the time."

" She's crazy - Jasper.. i'm ganna go take a walk, I'll see you at the airport okay?"

" Okay see you there."

I grabbed a pen and a note pad from Alice's nightstand before going out into my car to write a note to Edward.

_Edward,_

_I'm glad you're with you're family now but I'm getting married and we don't have a chance at getting back together. If this is why you're moving in with Alice don't bother, it would break her heart if she found out. I will always love you, as a friend nothing more. Please don't contact me or Jake. You shouldn't play games with him, I didn't like that side of you and it hurt me to see Jake so angry. Don't do it again. This is goodbye._

_P.S. if you're home Alice or Jasper will tell me and I won't be coming over so don't bet on seeing me again._

I folded up the paper and walked over to the woods to put it in a tree. I rubbed it against my hair for the extra scent. I knew Edward would find it, he would follow my scent anywhere. I put his name on the envelope so if anyone else found it, it would be given to him.

I had walked around Alice's vast property for an hour so I got Adam and headed home, it would take at least 2 hours to get through security and to our gate.

Chapter 22

We all met up outside our gate to the plane. Everyone said hi to one another including Jake, he shook Jasper's hand and everything. For looks I'm sure, he wanted me to be more than happy since we were going home.

" Wake me when we're home" I smiled at Jake once we were up in the air.

I woke up to turbulence in the late night, we were probably almost home. I gasped as I grabbed my chest. I had the worst dream. I was at my wedding and as I was walking up the isle to Jake, Victoria appeared in my peripherals. It seemed like 50 people jumping at her at once but none of them were fast enough because she bit down hard on my neck. I screamed out in pain. All the wolfs in attendance backed away and I was left with the vampires.

" Bella!" Alice ran over to me, probably too fast for a human.

" What Alice geese you scared the crap outta me!"

She gave me the weirdest look and looked like she wanted to cry.

" What?"

" Bella-" She said looking dazed out of her mind

" Why are you guys making all that noise?" Jake said waking up, he immediately moved back a couple inches clearly not expecting Alice to be right on us like she was.

" Oh never mind, I thought I saw something happen to Tanya but it changed. It was an over reaction."

She could be so weird sometimes. Maybe Tanya would get run over by a truck or something, at least it might mess up her hair. Jake and I watched Alice stalk back to her chair when we heard the pilot over the loud speaker. " Hello folks we will be making our way down to Seattle intl. in 2 minutes please facen your seat belts and stay seated."

" Finally. I've been up this whole time" Jake said exaggerated.

" You want me to drive home? You look really tired."

" Yeah that would be great, I don't think I could fall asleep but i'm still real tired. We can stay at my house for the night Billy won't care if we stay in the same room."

It took two hours to get into Forks and by the time we got to Billy's the sun was coming up. There were two cars in the drive way.

" Jake? Did Billy get another car?"

" No. That's Sam's car, I told the pack to meet us over here so we can discuss what happened since I last talked to them. You know, make sure it's safe and everything."

" Jake. Stop obsessing over this. Do you mind if I drive over to Alice's and sleep there? I don't think I'll be able to sleep with a bunch of rowdy wolves in that little house." I whined. I really did feel bad for leaving him for Alice again but it annoyed me that they had to stop by the first second we got there.

" Fine. You'll have to drive yourself though, remember the treaty."

" Yeah, I'll call you when I wake up."

I dropped Jake off without even heading inside, I was to exhausted to deal with all of them, plus they talk forever. I didn't bother calling Alice because I knew they would already be there, they probably made it there hours ago.

I didn't even bother knocking when I walked in, Alice wouldn't care, this was my second home anyways.

" Bella, we didn't expect you here so early." Jasper said surprised looking up from his book.

" Oh well I was wondering if I could crash here, Jake has the whole wolf pack at his house right now and I'm beat."

" Of course. Alice and Adam went to buy some food for any humans that should stop by. You can have any room, Esme and Carlisle's room is changed into a storage room at the moment so I guess there is Edwards old room or the couch in Carlisle's study. And Emmett and Rose's room of course but we all know what they do in there." He smirked.

I thought it through on which room to stay in. I wanted to just stay in Alice's room but they must want it open for themselves. Carlisle had a really nice leather couch in his study but that would make me real stiff so I really had no choice.

" Umm is the bed still in Edward's room?" I said shyly. I could feel my face turn scarlet.

" Yes. Don't worry Bella we don't think less of you for wanting to sleep in a bed." he laughed.

I walked slowly up to his room. I felt guilty for sleeping there even though I wasn't doing anything wrong. A lot of the stuff was still there, he even left behind a few journals. They looked fairly new too, maybe I would read them later. I've always wondered what was on his, much guarded, mind.

I noticed the end of the bed broken, a metal rose broken off. My mind flashed to that night. Edward and I slept together at his house while every one was away hunting. I wanted to have sex with him and he tried to convince me I didn't want it. He broke off one of the metal roses and mushed it up in his hand like play dough, reminding me how strong he was and how fragile I was.

I had to stop thinking about Edward and just go to sleep. At this rate I would be sleeping all day into the night again. I snuggled into the thick gold comforter and instantly fell asleep.

I woke up suddenly feeling really warm. My neck was sweaty and my hands real clammy. My cell phone said 2:30pm. Not bad at least I didn't spend the whole day sleeping. I dialed Jake's number so he wouldn't get worried.

" Bella?"

" Hey Jake. I literally just woke up."

" it's fine I'm just really glad you called me. listen I need you to stay with Alice and Jasper today and don't go anywhere without them. Okay?"

" Why what happened." I said panicking

" We got a fresh trail on Victoria, she's close by. I got the guys patrolling now and I'm discussing safety for you and the wedding with Billy and Sam if she isn't caught by then."

We planned on having the wedding October 20, which was in 2 and half months. We both love fall so it seemed fitting. The gloomy weather was a plus so if we had it outside all my vampires could come.

" Okay I guess we can go into town or something and start planning, do they already know?"

" Yeah I called them a few hours ago, I just wanted to tell you so you didn't think I was keeping things from you."

I heard loud talking down stairs and got distracted. "I'll call you later babe. Bye" I hung up still straining my neck to see out the door.

I walked slowly down the stairs trying to ease drop but the step creaked and the talking stopped.

" Good morning Bella." Alice said cheerfully.

" Good morning. What was that all about?" It wasn't like them to talk loud since they could hear so well and they usually wanted to keep it private.

" Oh nothing really...it's just that- well I don't really know how to tell you this but...Rose told Edward about Victoria and now he's in town. He said she's his." She said sourly

" You were just talking to him, here?"

" Alice you told him not to come around here right?"

" Yes Bella. Why do you think he just left. You know he does still respect your wishes."

" Drop it Alice." She always had to push everything. " let's go into town and look for dresses."

I knew she would instantly perk up and go into shopping mode which left me to think. Bumping into Edward is inevitable, I could either lie to Jake or convince him it would make me happy to be friends with him. Edward would have to know the boundary lines though and if he crossed them his last chance would be up.

We drove up to Port Angels to dress shop since we didn't have anything good in town. We spent 3 hours trying on dresses at two different stores. It really wasn't my thing to go shopping all day but I endured it for Alice's sake. She took it personally when ever I didn't like doing girly things with her.

" You didn't like any dresses we tried on Bella?" Alice said sadly on our way to the last store.

" Not really. Some were nice but nothing I _really _wanted."

" Well this last place is going to be great, they customize everything so you can tell them what you want."

" I don't know the first thing on designing a wedding dress, this is going to be a disaster."

" Don't worry I asked Jacob what he liked and we can mix that with what you look good in, I have it all figured out. Did you really think I would leave designing a wedding dress all to you?"

" I guess not. What did Jake say he liked anyway?"

" He said he thought you would look good in something romantic and classic, and lace. I didn't take him for a romantic guy but I guess I shouldn't judge him." Alice laughed.

I didn't think Jake would have that much of an opinion on my dress either. He knew me too well. I'm usually not that girly but I've always liked the wedding dresses that were very timeless, so if my daughter or granddaughter wanted to wear it they would be able to and not look dated in it.

The designer that we were working with was Timothy Grandue. He was a short muscular man who loved saying fabulous. Alice was so serious about this whole process but I couldn't help but laugh when ever he said something like " Fabulous!". It was utterly ridiculous, I mean he would throw his hands up and everything. Well let's just say I received a lot of hard looks from Alice.

After an hour of talking about different styles of dresses, colors of white, and different laces we had a design for my dress. It was going to be a floor length A line dress, strapless with short lace sleeves over it. It was the most beautiful dress I had ever seen and I could even picture myself in it on the wedding day. I could wear a flower in my hair and wear it up and wavy like someone right out of the twenties.

" Thanks for helping me with this Alice, I wouldn't want anyone else to do this." I said on our way back to her house.

" Of course, I'm glad you like the dress and i'm sure your going to like the rest of the wedding once it's planned."

When we were back at Alice's house Jasper was in the kitchen with Adam waiting for us.

" Want some steak Bella? Jasper got some steak. It looks good, even for me. Adam smiled.

" Sure sounds good, I'm famished." I said rubbing my belly

" Oh sorry Bella. We should have stopped for a snack while we were out."

" It's fine Alice, not eating for a few hours will do me good." Alice looked me up and down and disagreed with me.

"Jacob has called the house a few times trying to get a hold of you Bella. Your phone must have been off." Jasper said lightly.

" Thanks." I hopped down from my stool at the island in the kitchen and grabbed the phone. I saw Jasper and Alice walk out the back door as I came in the kitchen again.

" Where are they going?" I said dialing the phone.

" I think they're meeting with Edward. He was here earlier. He seems real great. He even thanked me for being in your life when he wasn't" Adam said waggling his eyebrows.

I laughed carelessly thinking of Adam's little man crush on Edward.

" Hey Jake it's me I heard you were calling for me so I'm calling back. Love you." I said into the answering machine. He must be patrolling or something.

Right as I looked up from hanging up the phone Edward walked into the kitchen casually. Apparently he didn't want to make me happy by staying away.

" What are you doing here?" I scowled.

" Testy today aren't we?" Edward said amused.

" I thought Alice and Jasper were going out to talk to you?"

" Well if they went to talk to me they didn't inform me on it." His face lit up with that stupid crooked smile of his, it always melted me heart even when I didn't want it to.

" So-"

" Just hear me out here Bella." He interrupted me " I know that your with Jacob Black now but I still want you in my life. Your presence has always lit up my life and I need it now. I'm only asking to be your friend. Support, a friend to gossip with? Maybe even a second wedding planner?"

I thought it over for a few minutes, neither of us moving. It couldn't hurt to be friends with him, I was after all thinking of being friends with him anyways not long ago. I wanted so bad to hate him because he left me and I wanted to make him suffer but i could never hold a grudge for very long.

" Fine. But not a word to Jake, he would hate me so I'll have to tell him when the time it right."

" That won't be a problem. I was trying to track Victoria earlier and I ran into Sam and Jacob at the treaty line. At first it almost turned into a fight but then we all cooled down and decided if we were allies it would be beneficial to finding Victoria. After we were all on good terms I asked if it would be alright if we could all friends. Of course Jacob wasn't too fond of you and I being friends but Sam told him it would be better to have more vampires around you to keep you safe while they are away for the time being." He smiled so proudly that he made a peace treaty.

" What do you mean they are going to be away?"

" They've been patrolling non stop and they are planning to stay on patrol for a while and just stay out in the woods. Victoria was in town last night and killed two tourists. They aren't happy."

" He could have passed on the message." He was so careless. We were getting married in two and a half months and he wouldn't be here to plan any of it with me. " Is that why you thought I would want a second wedding planner?"

" Yes. It's the best thing, you wouldn't want Victoria ruining your wedding would you?"

" Nope. I guess it'll be good to have a guy around to have his opinion" I laughed knowing that Edward and Jacob's tastes were probably totally different.

" So what's going on tonight?" Edward said trying to change the mood.

" Nothing really, I should try and get over to Charlie's house, I haven't seen him yet."

" Sounds fun, Alice assigned me to driving duty when she isn't here so I'll be your chauffeur for the night." He said bowing down.

" If you must. You can drive me over there in an hour. Why don't you hang out with Adam while i'm gone he's probably really bored."

" That can be arranged."

" Don't do it just cuz of me, do it cuz you want to"

" I know." He said it like he knew that but I know he was just saying it to make me happy.

**A/N- Review please! it makes my day:)**


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 23

**Edward POV**

It felt so strange to be on good terms with Bella and Jacob. I couldn't care less about Jacob except for the fact that I needed his permission to see Bella or she would be in trouble but I had dreamed about being on good terms with Bella for so long it seemed like it was a dream now.

I talked to Adam quietly in the kitchen while Bella was eating dinner. After I dropped Bella off at Charlie's house Adam and I would go hunting together. I was curious to know the vampire that was with Bella for the 5 years I wasn't with her. I wanted to know everything I missed.

Bella seemed to feel awkward on the way to Charlie's house but I was the most content I have been in a long time. I remembered the days when we were together and we drove back to Charlie's house everyday.

" Um I think you should just drop me off, I don't know what I would say to Charlie about you."

" Oh of course. Just call my cell when you want me to come and get you, unless your staying with Jacob." I didn't want to think of them sleeping in the same bed together but I added it to tell her I knew the situation.

" Is it the same number?" She said looking up from under her brown lashes.

" You remember my number still?" I mused

" Yes I had used it so much before that it never left me." She laughed

" It's not the same by the way." I laughed with her " It's 548-0781."

" Okay I'll call you later." She said as she was getting out.

I was in such a good mood when I got home that Jasper decided to go hunting with Adam and I. After we all caught two deer each we found a small creek deep in the woods to sit by and talk.

" So Adam tell me about the five years I missed with Bella and Jacob." I wasn't going to ask about Bella right away but the forest was so beautiful during sunset that it reminded me of her.

" Well I met Bella the first day of school and she told me she knew I was a vampire and we have been friends ever since. I think when we met she was still pretty hurt over what happened and it made her feel better to have a vampire near her and someone to confide in the supernatural things she knew about." He laughed lightly.

" I always suspected that she had a hard time with no one to talk about us with. I'm glad she had you when she had no one else."

" Don't get me wrong Jacob was there all the time for her but he never wanted to hear about you guys so I think I was the go to guy to talk about the Cullen's" Adam rolled his eyes and smiled.

" How long did it take for her to get better?" Jasper mused beside me. For a while I almost forgot he was here.

" A while. She's better now but I know there was always a little part of her heart that was missing, I'm glad she has most of you guys back for her now."

" Well Alice and I always took care of her the only way we could then. I remember back when we all first left" Jasper looked to me, I didn't hear anything about when they stayed behind yet. " Alice and I would take turns watching over her at night, even when she was in the hospital, It hurt to go near her. I couldn't believe the amount of pain she felt over us leaving, especially you Edward. It's amazing how much progress she's made."

" I did it for her." I said sternly even though no one was accusing me of anything.

" The outcome would have changed, I mean look at it now." Jasper said matter of factly.

" Maybe it didn't change at all, maybe Bella won't be happy with Jacob. I know that I will never go back to Tanya though." We all laughed.

" I'll have to meet your Denali friends sometime they sound like great people."

" They are, what ever Carlisle hasn't taught you I'm sure they could." I admired Adam, he was always trying to better himself and know as much about vampirism as possible.

" So how did Bella and Jacob come to be?" I asked casually

" Do you really want to know that?" Adam raised his eye brows at me.

" Yes I do, I'm just trying to get all the information about when I was gone."

" Ok, well Jacob has always wanted to be more to her but Bella has never seen him like that. I think it was because she was always hooked on you but after a couple of years she figured you wouldn't ever come back for her so she went out with Jacob one night and it just clicked I guess."

" I figured so, if the world was right and we didn't exist he would be the natural course for her anyways. I'm glad she's with the right person." I winced and then composed myself quickly. " Tell me about when she was the most happy." I smiled remembering how she use to laugh and be so carefree with me.

" There weren't that many truly happy times for her but I do remember this one time a couple years ago. Jacob's wolf pack came up to visit us for a weekend and we all went out to this real beautiful forest. We went running and I offered Bella to go on my back but instead Seth Clearwater picked her up by her shirt and threw her on his back like a horse! She rode for hours like that. Most of the time she laughed and smiled, but when she thought no one was looking she leaned against Seth and closed her eyes and just smiled. I don't think I have ever seen her that happy, or laugh that hard!"

I couldn't help but laughing at that story. It was just like Seth to be the joker and for Bella to have fun doing it. She always loved riding on my back while I ran. All three of us sat at that creek for hours talking about the 5 years that I missed, not just about Bella either even though that's what I would have wanted to talk about forever, we talked about Jasper and Alice. We made a plan to go see Carlisle and Esme, they would be overjoyed to see me even though I didn't deserve it. My cell phone rang at 10:00.

" Hello?"

" Hi Edward, it's me." Bella.

" Hello, how was Charlie?"

" He was great, emotional. I don't see him often enough." She sounded sad.

" Do you need me to come get you?"

" Yeah, have you seen or talked to Jake lately? He still hasn't called me and told me what he's doing."

" No I haven't, I think he thought I would just tell you."

" There must be something going on, he usually tells me himself."

" I'll see if someone can go find him for you. I'll be there in 5 minutes"

" Thanks Edward. I'll be outside."

" Jazz can you go see if you can find Jacob Black? I think they said they were camping out 20 miles from here but they might be running patrol. Just wait at the treaty line of where you smell their trail. They'll find you. I need to go pick up Bella. You coming Adam?"

" Nah I'll run." I nodded at him and he was off.

" What shall I say when I find Jacob?"

" Bella needs to either see him or hear from him, she's worried."

Jasper nodded and ran away as well, now I would be left with Bella. I smiled to myself. No matter what the situation was with Bella and I, I would always love her more than life itself, I planned to show her that when ever I got the chance.

I pulled up quietly to the curb and she walked over to me looking glum. I could hear Charlie's thoughts inside _' I'm so happy Bells is back.' ' I'm going to have a talk with Jacob about how to treat my daughter, he can't be running off without tell her where he is now' ' I wonder why Alice didn't come in and say hi when she picked Bella up?' _

Bella got in still quiet. " Hello" I said making the first move

" Hi, I'm staying with Alice again unless you want your room."

" No, no it's fine. I don't need a bed anyways." I smiled and got a slight smile back from her. " So you told Charlie Alice was picking you up?" I raised my eyebrow.

" You were listening?" She moved her body in my direction instead of toward the window.

" To Charlie. He was wondering why Alice didn't come and say Hi. And if I might add Jacob is going to get a stern talking to by your father when he sees him. He's planning on going over to Billy's tomorrow to see if he's home."

" Oh gees." She put her head in her hands and shook it dramatically but after a second she stopped and started to sob.

" What's wrong?" I pulled over and didn't know where to put my hands to comfort her so I wrapped her in my arms like a baby and sang her lullaby.

" Jake has never done this. He has a cell phone, he should have called before he turned into a wolf for days."

" I have Jasper finding Jacob right now, everything's going to be fine Bella." I kissed her sweet smelling hair and rested my head there for a few moments.

" Edward?"

" Hmmhm?" I was too content to say anything.

" Thank you. I really needed that."

" Anytime you need anything ever, I'm here. You know that."

Chapter 24

The car ride home was silent but Bella wasn't sad anymore. We walked in to find Jasper and Alice watching the news. They both looked up when we walked in but didn't say anything. I listened in on both of their thoughts _' I'm soo happy we're going to see Carlisle and Esme!' I wonder If I should tell Bella and Edward about the vision change?' Something isn't decided though, I'll just wait so I know the whole story' ' Edward better not kill me, it's not my fault I couldn't get a hold of the dog. Bella is right there must be something going on, they're protecting him.'_

" Jazz what happened?"

" I found where they were, patrolling in Canada, the leader said that Jacob wasn't with them and that he would pass on the message that Bella is looking for him when they see him next."

" What? That makes no sense." Bella blurted out next to me.

" I think they are protecting him, I could see it in his eyes he wanted to tell me more but he couldn't, I don't understand it but I think everything will be fine Bella." We could both sense Bella feeling anxious so Jasper made her relaxed and sent her up to bed.

" When are we visiting Carlisle and Esme?" Alice jumped up and down when Bella was up stairs in bed.

" Alice, what vision did you have that you didn't want to tell us about."

" Oh nothing, you'll find out soon. I'm not sure what it means yet so I'm not saying anything. Don't worry it's good news. I think" She was doing a pretty good job at keeping that vision and what she thought of it out of her head so I let it go.

" We can go visit Carlisle and Esme as soon as possible as long as you don't see us getting into any trouble."

" I tried and it's just blank so Bella must be going with us."

" Of course Alice, Jacob told us to take care of her while he's gone. Unless she wants to stay with Charlie of course, I'm sure Adam could stay here with her?" I said it a question looking at Adam.

" Yeah no problem. I can always go some other time to see Carlisle and Esme again."

**Bella POV **

I awoke from the most horrible dream. I was big and swollen and bruised all over like someone ran me over with a train. I didn't want to live anymore, I felt like I didn't have Jake anymore so I went to the Voultri to die. I'm not sure why I went to the Voultri to die since I'm human and why would they care. It just didn't make sense but i woke up crying anyways because of how sad I felt when i woke up. I had to shake it off before I went downstairs to see everyone.

I heard the door creak open and I saw Edward's head pop in.

" Oh, good morning. I thought you were still asleep I heard you tossing and you sounded uncomfortable. I was going to get Jasper."

" Thanks anyways."

Edward looked me up and down slyly but I still noticed. I blushed scarlet because I was wearing a sexy blue Frederick's of Hollywood night gown that showed a lot of skin.

" I'll be down stairs, would you like some breakfast?" Always the gentleman

" Yeah that'd be great. Blueberry pancakes?" I grinned, that sounded so good.

" Blueberry pancakes it is."

I took a steaming hot shower to relax my muscles. Since I was using Alice's bathroom it was stocked with every beauty regimen that has ever been made. Not that she ever used them. I put a paste on my face that smelled like berries and supposedly the steam from the shower would moisturize my face while also deep cleaning my pores.

Alice was sitting at the vanity when I got out. I grabbed the soft purple towel on the sink.

" Gees! Don't you ever knock?" Not that she hasn't seen me naked before but it was when I couldn't take a shower myself so it wasn't that embarrassing.

" I wasn't looking" She laughed " besides I wanted to talk to you before we left today."

" What do you mean leave?" I heard my voice go up an octave from stress. I couldn't bear it if they left me again.

" Relax. We're going to visit Carlisle and Esme. I wanted to know if you wanted to come. You don't have to I know you must be waiting for Jacob but your welcome if you want. They would love to see you just as much as us."

" I don't know Alice. You're leaving today?" It would be great to see Carlisle and Esme again and invite them to the wedding but I didn't want to leave if Jake was trying to get a hold of me. I really miss him too.

" I can have Edward go talk to Sam and see what the problem is if you want. Jasper said he looked like he couldn't talk aloud maybe Edward could listen to him."

" That would be great. If I still can't get a hold of Jake then I'll go. If he is off doing god knows what then so should I. Now get out so I can get dressed."

I watched Alice skip out the door and tell Edward what she told me. I took my time getting dried off. I even put lotion on and blow dried my hair. I walked down the hall in my towel to Edward's room to pick out my clothes I had with me. Before I could pick anything out I saw the note Alice left on the bed next to a bag. ' Thought you would like this. You need something new. 3 Alice' It was skinny jeans with plaid patches on the knees and the butt, a long sleeve shirt with an open back that was covered up with lace. It was a cute outfit.

" Bella you look soo cute!" Alice hugged me when I was on the last step of the stairs.

" Thanks. For the compliment and the clothes." I laughed Before I could ask Alice answered my question.

" Food's in the kitchen." She said over shoulder as she was walking back to the couch.

I skipped to the kitchen remembering how good Edward's cooking was. Yum. Next to my 4 blueberry pancakes and milk was a note in elegant scrip. ' Hope you enjoy your breakfast. I'll find Jacob for you.' He was always way too kind to me.

Edward walked in two long hours later. I jumped up and waited for the information I knew he had.

" Jacob isn't hiding from you Bella. They went in groups to hunt for Victoria. He didn't take his cell phone and was in a hurry so he thought it would be fine if I just passed along the message. He's with Leah about 3 hours away from here, they're close to getting her this time. Sam said they won't be back for at least a few days. They aren't planning on coming back this way until she's dead."

" Is he serious! Jake is such an idiot. Victoria isn't as important as I am, he should have stayed here with me."

" I would have done the same. He wants you safe."

" Well I bet you would stay if I asked you to! He didn't even give me the chance to say bye. What if something happens to him?"

" Don't worry about it, Sam said he would give me updates everyday and if anything happened."

I loosened up when he said that.

" Thanks. I guess I'm going with you guys to see Carlisle and Esme then, no sense in waiting here for no one." I tried to smile but I just couldn't help but think of Jake going up against Victoria, with her cat like stance and fire red hair.

Our flight was in an hour so I packed a smaller bag than what I brought with me and got in the car. Damn vampires, just because they can move at the speed of light doesn't mean I should have to rush all the time. We were all planning on staying with the Cullen's for the weekend and would come back Monday morning.

Alice rented a private jet for the weekend because it was going to be sunny out there almost the whole weekend. I guess we were going to pretend to be sleeping during the day when we arrived so we had an excuse to wait till it got dark to go out side. I wasn't pretending though. I would stay up until we got there and actually go to sleep.

Ithaca was beautiful, mostly country but it was nice. We all stayed on board and pretended to sleep. I woke up at 7:00 from Alice shaking my arm. I'm a light sleeper she probably could have just said my name a few times but she chose to be annoying instead.

" What Alice?"

" Wake up it's time to leave we already put all our stuff in the rental car, c'mon their waiting for us at the house."

She was really impatient today. I could see why though, she never wanted to lose contact with them it was just because of the terms Edward set about seeing me. Rosalie and Emmett were staying with Carlisle at the moment so we would see them again.

The car ride over to Carlisle and Esme's country home was almost quiet except for Alice's excited babble. I could see that Edward was nervous, not that he would say it out loud. We pulled up in front of a gorgeous log cabin only it wasn't really a cabin due to it's huge size. Everyone got out but Edward hesitated. I put my hand on his arm and smiled encouragley to him and it seemed to work.

" Welcome home all of you!" Carlisle said meeting us at the door. Alice was first to jump into his arms

" Carlisle how are you?"

" I'm quite well" he laughed

" And Esme! I missed you guys soooo much." We all laughed and rolled our eyes. We went inside and said our hello's and hugged each other. They seemed really surprised to see me, I guess they didn't think I would go any where with Edward.

We all spent the whole day together. We ordered food for me so we didn't have to go out. It was great, just like old times. I did go to sleep around 10:00 though so my sleeping pattern wouldn't get weird. Carlisle and Esme wanted to take me and Alice out shopping tomorrow, I guessed they would take the guys out hunting or something after us.

We shopped all morning. Esme and Carlisle couldn't have been any prouder if I was their own child when I told them I was getting married to Jake. They insisted on helping me with my gift registry. I secretly hoped they wouldn't offer to buy anything. I have a hard time saying no to people.

" So Bella how have you been since we last saw you. We were surprised you came to see us seeing as how Edward is here." Carlisle said when we sat down in the food court for a drink.

" Well I wouldn't have missed seeing you guys for anything. Well I wasn't going to come actually because Jake is out trying to find Victoria but he won't be back for a while and I didn't want to be by myself. And i've been pretty good lately but a while back I wasn't in such good shape."

" Well it would be expected. We didn't think you would just be all right with us leaving." Esme said kindly.

" How long have you and Edward been on good terms?" Esme hedged. I wasn't sure if she was trying to see if there was something going on between Edward and I or if she was just curious.

" Not long a couple days. I went to go see him at first, Rosalie said he wasn't doing so good so I was going to tell him to move on but I really gave it to him when I saw him. He can be so selfish sometimes. But anyways. Sam told Jake it would be a good idea to have him around me since Victoria is out there. He agreed to just be friends so I guess we're fine now."

" Well that's nice Bella. I'm glad you two can be civil." Esme's eyes lit up knowing her son wasn't in pain anymore.

" We better get going Jasper wanted to hunt earlier so he's probably real thirsty now." Alice said looking at her watch.

" Yes of course. Edward called me and said him and Adam went earlier so it'll just be us, Emmett, Rosalie, and Jasper" Carlisle agreed.

When we were back at the house everyone left to go hunting right away. Adam decided to go again just to spend some time with them before we left. He loved them like his own parents. I turned on one of my favorite movie ' Never Been Kissed' Edward sat down next to me.

" Mind if I watch it with you?"

" Go ahead." After a few minutes he couldn't help but talk.

" This movie is ridiculous. A teacher falling in love with what he believes is a 17 years old girl."

" Is it any different than what our situation was. You were even older!" We both laughed

" Touché."

We started talking about other things and the movie was just background noise that we didn't notice.

" What are you thinking about?" I asked after a while.

" How lucky I am that Jacob wanted me here to protect you when he was gone."

" Well in his defense he probably wouldn't have chosen you but it was Sam's order."

" Then I'm glad I'm in with Sam." He smiled.

" Can I ask you something?"

" Anything."

" Why did you send Tanya to tell me you guys were all happy after you left?"

He cocked his head to the side and looked confused. " I didn't send Tanya to see you."

" Yeah she came to see me in the hospital and said that she was sorry this is the way it had to be and that " The Cullen's " were happy now." I was starting to get confused too. If Edward didn't send her who did.

" She must have come on her own. Tanya can be quite the bitch when she wants to." He grimaced " I'm truly sorry you shouldn't have had to hear her say that. it wasn't true by the way."

" What that you weren't all happy without me?"

" Yes, we were all miserable. I was miserable every second I was with her."

" Then why did you do it, why did you go with her?" I said looking down

" It was in the vision. I was so depressed after leaving you that I didn't care about anything anymore. I see now that I was weak. Alice saw the vision because of how weak I was and how willing Tanya was to ruin things for me just to be with me."

Before I could say anything else everyone came in through the door having a great time. It clashed with our serious conversation. " Another time." Edward mouthed.

I opted to go to sleep early tonight. I was feeling so exhausted lately, tomorrow me and Edward were going fishing on a lake near by anyways. Alice planned a lot with the family and I felt bad that Edward was spending so much time with me but he said there would be ages to see him family. It made me feel a little bit better

At the last minute it was planned to go back to Forks. I knew Esme and Carlisle were itching to go back and see the town. They silently brung me to the private plane without me even knowing while I was sleeping. I awoke in the Cullen house in Forks. I wasn't surprised though. Things like that happen all the time with them.

Chapter 25

" Cheater!" I laughed. I looked up from our game of chess to see Edward laughing. He jumped up and started to tickle me.

" STOP!" I giggled " No fair I can't fight back."

" Life isn't fair hasn't anyone ever told you that?" He said stopping.

We spent almost the whole weekend together and much of our time back in Fork and really got closer. He didn't act so guarded and I liked it. He made me feel better about Jake not being with me much. It seemed like he was really okay with just being friends, even when all the Cullen's and I talked about the wedding. Esme and Carlisle were honored to be invited, they still thought of me as their daughter and that was fine because I felt like they were my second parents.

" What are you guys doing in here. Sounds like fun!" Emmett came in and wiggled his eyebrows.

" Very funny." I rolled my eyes. Emmett acted like it was his job to make sexual innuendos.

" Esme made dinner Bella. Hope you like Chinese. Smells disgusting but then again all food smells disgusting to me."

" Chinese is fine."

I spent the morning with Charlie but he wanted to go fishing so I told him I would be fine eating with the Cullen's. Billy suggested I go and hang out with Emily but it wasn't as much fun being with her. I think she resented me for hanging out with the Cullen's again, I know Sam did.

I walked to the kitchen ahead of Emmett and Edward because they were listening to a message on Edward's phone. I couldn't care less I was starving.

" Bella wait a minute you might want to hear this. It's from Sam."

" Just give me the play by play if it's just like yesterday's update." Sam was updating us as he promised but it wasn't anything I wanted to hear. Just useless information about where they were headed and what didn't happen. I told Sam not to even bother calling my phone unless it was good or bad news, nothing useless.

" Well Sam said they are in Alaska right now, maybe a couple hours behind her."

" More useless information. It would be nice if Jake just called himself."

" I'm sure he's doing his best Bella." Esme said at the table. She was drawing up a design for a little crumbling cabin about 200 years old she found in the woods around here.

" I know but at this rate he won't be able to help with any of the wedding stuff. I mean it's great having Edward and Alice there but I wish I had his opinion."

We already picked out the dress, bridesmaid dresses, our color scheme, our venue, flowers, our DJ, and our photographer. I was waiting as long as I could to pick the menu because I knew that would probably be what Jake cared most about. I sighed knowing I wasn't going to get my way.

" Hey Edward do you want to go on a hike with me after dinner? It's only 3 it should be light out for a while."

" Bella! I thought we were going to the caterer later." Alice whined, she must have heard the conversation from upstairs.

" I wanted to save that for Jake and I, If he isn't back in a week then we can go. I already cancelled the appointment so you can't say anything." I smiled.

" Fine." She pouted.

" So?"

" I'd like to go on a hike with you. I haven't just run in a while."

I cleaned my dishes- even though Esme tried to insist on doing them- and put on a thick plaid shirt over my long sleeved brown shirt. I ran down stairs to meet Edward in the back yard.

" Shall we?" He said reaching for me to help me on his back.

" We shall." I was laughing a lot with Edward lately but I missed doing it with Jake.

We ran for about a half hour and ended up in our meadow. It was just as I remembered it. The perfect circle with wild flowers all over the place and a little stream off to the side for great background noise. I didn't even realize that we were just staring until Edward cleared his throat and lifted me off his back and onto the ground.

" Oh sorry." It wasn't awkward but I felt like maybe it was for him. When I blinked he was 20 yards away under the tree that he sat under the first time we came here. I walked slowly over to him admiring how beautiful he was in the evening sun.

" You know Bella... sometimes it's really hard to be around you."

" Why what did I do? I can move back a little if you want."

" No, no I'm quite comfortable what I meant was that I still really love you. I feel myself slipping into the way we use to be and then I remember it's not the same, you have a fiancé."

"I'm sorry" I whispered. It isn't fair for me to want to hang out with Edward all the time. It's just like it was when Jake wanted to be more. I was very selfish but I wanted to be with him all the time even though it hurt him.

" I would rather be friends with you than nothing at all. Always remember that."

" We should stop hanging out as much as we do. Besides Alice is probably real jealous we're best friends too."

" You consider us best friends?"

" Yes I do. The past few days have been great I didn't think we would be this close again let alone this fast."

" It _has_ been great. Jacob wouldn't be pleased."

" Jake is going to have to deal with the fact that we're friends now. You're coming to the wedding right? I mean you don't have to, you shouldn't have to go through that." I said it all real quick making an excuse so he could say no.

" I wouldn't miss it for the world. I'm just glad that it's in no mans land or I wouldn't be able to go."

" Of course why did you think I was having it in town."

The sun turned into sunset after a while of talking but we didn't care. If I was being honest with myself I was enjoying spending time with Edward way too much. I could easily spend most of my time with Alice, Charlie, or any of my old high school friends but I chose to be with him.

" We should get back it's getting pretty dark"

" y-yeah sure." We stopped talking after a while and we were just laying on the ground next to each other. It was relaxing and I didn't mind if we kept doing that for a while but I wouldn't say that to Edward it would probably just hurt him more than it was hurting him to be with me all the time.

When we got home Alice was pouting in her room, she was reading a really big book.

" Gees Alice." Edward grumbled as he walked by her room. I on the other hand couldn't hear everyone's thoughts so I walked in and asked her what was wrong.

" Don't you like me anymore Bella." She gave me the puppy dog eyes

" Of course I like you, what's wrong?"

" I've hardly saw you the past few days and seems like you'd rather spend time with Edward."

" Alice, if I didn't like you do you think I would be making you my matron of honor?"

" What?" Really?"

" Of course." I hugged her as hard as I could with out bruising myself as she squealed.

" I'm going to tell Esme and Rose!"

" That was nice of you." Edward strolled in. He was clearly listening in to our conversation.

" I wouldn't want anyone else." I smiled knowing how happy I made her " I'm gonna go to bed I'll talk to you tomorrow ok?"

" Yes of course"

It had been a week since I last got an update from Sam. If Jake didn't come back today I would have to plan the rest with out him. I was praying I would get a call from Sam today. I felt exhausted even though I just woke up. I had the weirdest dream and I wanted to get it out so I went to tell Alice.

"I dreamed I was in the forest. At first I was by myself wandering around not knowing what I was looking for. Then Jake and Edward showed up from different directions. Jake took my hand and tried to pull me away but I didn't want to go so I took Edward's hand in my other hand and told them both to stay. They said you can only have one. Right after they said that my body tore in half and they each walked away with a half."

" That is weird but It's pretty obvious what your self conscious is trying to tell you right? "

" Um no. If it was obvious I wouldn't have come to you."

" Is it possible you might still love Edward?"

" No! Of course not. I'm in love with Jake."

" Calm down. I won't tell anyone, just between us. It is possible to love two people at the same time."

" I-I don't know. Maybe" I drifted off in my mind to think back on all the time Edward and I have spent together over the past week and a half. I have been really happy.

" You seem pretty conflicted, maybe you should think about the wedding-"

" ALICE!"

" What?" She looked confused

" Are you crazy? I can't break off the marriage just because I'm conflicted."

" Your going to be married for the rest of your life don't you want to be with the one your madly in love with."

"Alice- I think I love them both."

Chapter 26

" Bella-" Alice held up her finger to tell me not to talk. " I'll be right back okay."

I waited in her room. I don't know why she stopped but I'm sure someone was listening to us or something.

" Sorry, I saw a vision that Tanya was headed this way and I needed to warn the others."

" Oh...I thought someone was listening to our conversation but this seems worse." I laughed nervously. The last thing I wanted to see was Tanya and if she saw me she would probably get jealous and think Edward and I were together. Who knows what she would do to me.

" It's fine Bella. Carlisle and Emmett are going to see her and tell her it's not the best time to come and visit."

" Okay, if you think it's fine."

" It is. Now, back to you. I think you should wait it out for a week or two maybe before you make any decisions. Pay attention to your feelings."

" I guess, thanks Alice." With a hug and a kiss on the cheek she went off with Jasper and I was left with myself. I can't believe this happened again. What was I going to do? I guess I wouldn't do anything different. I love Jake with all my heart and he was there when no one else was. Being friends with Edward would have to be enough for both of us. Edward interrupted my thoughts when he walked in and smiled. I forgot everything I was thinking about. He leaned against the door way swinging keys around his finger.

" Up for a trip today?" I knew I should spend some time away from him but I couldn't say no to him.

" To where?" I challenged him.

" The beach. There is this great spot past the reservation that no one knows about. It's pretty warm so I thought we could pack a picnic, for you of course." That smile again.

" This wouldn't be an attempt to get me away from the house because Tanya is near would it?"

" Of course not."

" Let's go." I giggled. He couldn't protect me from everything. Edward's face furrowed.

" Bella, someone is here to see you." Alice appeared in the doorway. They both didn't look very happy.

Sure enough when I went down stairs Jake was standing in the open doorway with his nose scrunched up.

" JAKE!" I ran and jumped up into his arms. He was dirty and only had shorts on but it was okay with me. I hadn't seen him in so long. I closed my eyes and breathed in his musky earth smell. I felt him rest his head on mine and his heart rate slowed down from before. I guess walking into a house of vampires would do that to a werewolf.

" I missed you so much Bella. You have no idea."

" I think I might have an idea. Don't ever leave again without calling me. Ever."

" I promise." Without even thinking I reached up and kissed him. I didn't plan on making it a tingle-all-over-kiss but we both just got caught up in the moment. It was ruined however by Emmett, I believe, coughing on the couch. we both parted looking embarrassed.

" Oh sorry Jake did you want to go out side the smell is probably uncomfortable for you."

" First I have to talk to the Cullen's."

" Oh yeah I thought you weren't suppose to come on their land."

" He wasn't suppose to." Edward said from the corner with his arms crossed over his chest. I haven't seen him look that hostile in a while.

" Chill. It's about Victoria." He waited but no one said anything so he continued. " We lost her yesterday, she came back down this way and then we lost her scent, must have gotten in a car or something. The others are following a trail they found earlier today, if it's anything worth while we're leaving Monday to follow it. I know we all don't get along but I wanna ask two favors."

" Go ahead, we're listening Jacob" Carlisle said willingly.

" First off I want Bella to stay here with you again." He looked to me " and if she wants to stay with Charlie or Billy I ask someone watches the house."

" She is always welcome." Carlisle prodded him along.

" Secondly I - well the pack was wondering if you guys could keep a look out for her. If you come across anything let us know."

" We'll let you know don't worry, I can't promise we will wait for you to get her though." Emmett jumped in. I glared at him, they were all so ready to put themselves against Victoria just to save me.

" That's all. I won't breach the treaty again."

" I'll drive!" Jake paused to look down at me and then took my hand. The car ride to Billy's house was quiet but it was only because we were enjoying each other's presence.

" So Most of the wedding is already planned but I saved the caterer for us to do together." I said at dinner that night.

" Tell me about it." Jake smiled

" Well since our wedding is in October our colors are brown and orange with some green in it. When we were picking out flowers I told them your Indian so they put feathers in the arrangements. I thought it was kind of funny so I left them, if that's okay?"

" Keep them, it is pretty funny." Billy didn't look like he thought it was that funny but it wasn't his wedding.

" Well anyways, I already got my wedding dress and the two bridesmaid dresses-"

" Wait who are the brides maids?"

" Alice and Esme. I hoped you wouldn't mind but I invited all the Cullen's and Adam of course. It would really mean a lot to me if they were there." I cringed at what he might say.

" I'm not happy but they are a big part of your life I guess, It sucks that my wedding is going to reek though." I couldn't help but laugh, he meant it to be serious but it just didn't come out that way. " Where is it going to be anyways?"

" It's going to be at this real nice bed and breakfast in town and the ceremony will be in the church my parents got married in. I would have considered something to do with when your parents got married but you weren't around."

"My wife and I got married at city hall anyways, we were to eager to do anything else" Billy said with aged eyes.

" What should we do tonight Bell?" Jake changed the subject I knew he didn't want any talk that wasn't happy, he wasn't going to be home for that much longer. I wanted to do something with him but he looked beat, like he hadn't slept for a week straight.

" Let's just watch a movie or something and go to bed early."

" That sounds really good right now."

I cleaned the kitchen while Jake got a movie ready in his room. He had to drag the old TV and DVD player out of his sisters old room. I laughed to myself thinking about all the work he was doing in his room right now. I could hear him moving around his little bed and the tv stand to get it just right so we would be comfortable.

Jake chose the wedding crashers to watch, it was one of his favorite movies. Billy went over to Charlie's to watch a football game but I suspected he wanted to give us time alone, he knew Jake would be leaving again soon too. We both cuddled on his twin bed. It felt good to be held by Jake again.

" Jake?"

"Mmhhmm?" He sounded like he was drifting off to sleep.

" Do you have to go again?"

" Yea" He paused and turned me over to face him. " I'm trying to keep you safe." He said it like there was only one explanation.

" What if I asked you to stay with me? There is enough people to take your place, they wouldn't be short handed."

" I can't just stay behind."

" Why not? I need you here with me. I'm tired of being without you." I knew I was being stubborn but he acted like there was no other option but to leave.

" Bella this is how it has to be for the time being. Besides I want to be the one to kill Victoria. She isn't going to mess with us anymore."

It was just like him to want to go for the fight, just to kill a vampire. It brought me to what Edward was saying earlier about how he would want to be out there killing Victoria himself but if I asked him to he would stay to make me happy. No, it wasn't fair to compare each of them together. They were both so different and yet both perfect in their own way.

" I think I'm just going to go to bed." I said rolling over.

"night baby" He was oblivious that he upset me.

" Bella can I talk to you?" Jake and I spent the whole weekend attached at the hip. We mostly hung out just together and talked but we spent a little while with Billy and Charlie and of course the wolf pack. Leah seemed to really respect Jake now that they were hunting for Victoria together, Jake didn't seem like he liked her anymore than before so I was satisfied. I knew he would most likely be going away on Monday so I dreaded it. It was later in the day so I thought maybe the trail didn't lead to anything but I knew that look on his face.

" Yeah" I said quietly

" I just got the call from Sam that me and Leah are to follow the trail they found, they think that they found where she's hiding out."

" If you have to" I could feel the tears spilling over my eyes and my lips trembling.

" Please don't make this hard for me. It is already." He put his head down " it might be a while before I come back so let me leave with a happy image in my head."

" I'm trying, really." I cuddled into his body. I wanted to remember his scent until the next time I saw him, which could be weeks.

" I love you Bella. Forever."

" I love you Jake, until the day I die."

We could have sat there in each others arms for an hour but it only felt like a few minutes to me.

" Alice Cullen is coming to pick you up. I want you to stay with her until I know I'm following Victoria."

" Okay." Jake got up an put his shoes on to leave to Sam's house. " Wait! you're leaving now?" I grabbed his arm.

" Yeah I should have left an hour ago but I wanted a little more time with you. Alice has permission to pick you up here so wait outside, she should be here in 5 minutes"

" Fine." I was defeated, he wouldn't stay for me. I sat on his bed looking out the window for a few minutes after he left. When i heard Alice honk the horn I jumped forgetting I was suppose to be outside already. I grabbed Jake's camouflage blanket to sleep with and ran out the door. " Sorry Billy!" I said passing him, he was probably uncomfortable with Alice waiting outside his house.

" Took you long enough." Alice huffed from the drivers seat. She took one look at me with tears and messy hair from laying down and decided to be a bit nicer. " I'm sorry you must be upset. Do you wanna talk about it?"

" Not right now Alice, let's just watch a movie and eat or something."

" We can watch a movie but I don't think you would want me to be eating right next to you." We both laughed at that one, Alice had really dry humor sometimes.

When we walked in the house Jasper and Edward were busy but immediately stopped to greet me. They both stepped back when they saw me.

" What happened?" Edward asked protectively.

" Calm down boys, her fiancé just left her to go hunt down a vampire how would you feel?" Alice interceded, she waved her hand into the kitchen to wait for her. She would probably cook something for me. She loved doing that lately.

" Right, I'm sorry Bella." I just smiled and walked away, I wanted to at least be miserable for an hour before Edward could cheer me up.

Alice strode into the kitchen a few seconds later. " What was that all about?"

" I was merely explaining to the boys the situation. They didn't know you are staying with us for a little while."

" Oh ok." I looked down and picked at my nails while Alice hummed and cooked breaded chicken breasts for me.

" You smell awful. You should take a shower." She tried to say nice. I knew even if I took a shower I would still smell because of Jake's blanket. I didn't tell them I had it for a reason. Knowing Alice she would take it while I was sleeping and wash it.

" Thanks for the advice, maybe later though." I could hear Edward talking on his phone in the other room. " Who is he talking to?"

" Nosy much?" Alice glared

" Well all of us are right here except Carlisle, Esme, Emmett, and Rosalie so who does he need to talk to?"

" I think he is arranging a flight for Adam to go to see the Danlis and find his creator."

" What ever I'm going to bed." When I reached the stairs Alice appeared in front of me

" It's only 6:30. I wanted to have a sleepover."

" I'm tired, maybe tomorrow." I knew she was talking with the boys about me but I didn't care enough to listen in. I got on the most comfortable pajamas I had and laid in Edward's bed thinking about Jake. I was depressed he was gone and even more that he didn't want to stay with me. I got the worst feeling in my stomach, it could have been jealousy that Leah got to be with him and not me or it could have been something else.

I finally fell asleep in the early hours of the morning only to have nightmares. I could almost feel what I was feeling in the dream. I could see Jake fighting with Victoria. She was ripping him to shreds. The screams-

" Bella! Wake up!" Alice, Jasper, and Edward were in the room next to me. I still have fresh tears in my eyes and sweat beading on my forehead.

" What happened?" I instantly felt better. " Thanks." I said sheepishly to Jasper

" You were having a bad dream. You were screaming at the top of your lungs and rolling around on the bed." Alice turned into a motherly figure. I saw Edward leaning up against the wall, he looked so worried I had the urge to tell everyone I was fine when I clearly wasn't.

" I'm fine now thanks. I'll just go back to bed."

" It's noon and your going back to bed?" Alice asked like I was half mad.

I thought it through. Sleep the rest of the day and be depressed or go out and get my mind off of Jake. I pursed my lips thinking it through. " Who wants to go do something?"

" Your going from one extreme to the next. We won't think any less of you if you want to stay in and chill." Alice acted like I was going mad.

" No really, I want to. I want to get my mind off of things." I looked at each of them but they all acted like I shouldn't go out. I gave my best puppy dog face but no one spoke up. " Fine I'll go for a hike by myself. I'll be back by dark."

" Wait. If your going anyways I'll go and make sure your safe." Edward sighed, I knew he wouldn't be able to resist me going some where by myself.

**A/N- this is the end of part 1 I'll have the second part up later today or tomorrow for sure. thanks for reading!**


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